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I have been coming to this site since the nightmare began last November. My son was on bail, reporting monthly, from the beginning of November until last week when he was charged with rape and 2 sexual offences. Throughout the time up to being charged I remained positive and told him not to worry because I read only 20% of those accused are charged and I thought he would get NFA but now he has been charged I am starting to panic so I decided to join the site to seek advice and chat how I am feeling because I don't really have anyone to talk to.
My son had been seeing his accuser for a few months and she had stayed at our house and she seemed quite nice. He really liked her although they had had their ups and downs and he was devastated when she told him a few days before the alleged rape that she really liked him but didn't want a serious relationship with him any more. I am very close to my son and could sense something was wrong but he didn't open up until the early hours of the morning when the alleged rape took place. He said he thought she was just scared after a bad experience and she was still texting and talking to him. I said he should just walk away but he said he needed closure and that if he knew she had been sleeping with someone else he could move on. He went to bed and I thought he would be in bed all day as was usual on a Sunday.
My husband and I went out shopping and when we got back his car had gone so I knew where he had gone. He returned just as F1 was starting but went straight upstairs. An hour later the nightmare began when the phone rang and the accusers dad was shouting that my son had raped his daughter and she had put up a fight and he would be covered in scratches. I dashed upstairs and there was not a mark on him and he said "Mum I haven't done anything". I left the phone with him and then my son came downstairs and said her dad had said we would be getting a visit from the police and 2 others. We were in shock and didn't take it seriously but an hour later the accusers dad and another man turned up at our house. We refused to open the door and so while her dad was shouting at the window the other man started smashing my son's car with a scaffolding pole. Her dad then took a crowbar out of their van and I am sure he would have tried to break in if neighbours hadn't then come out so they drove away. We were in shock and shaking but mu husband managed to phone the police and so did my son who had heard the noise and recognised her dad.
When the police came about the car just after 3pm my son gave a statement to the policewoman. He told her he was being accused of rape but he hadn't reaped her , there was just a bit of fumbling which was consensual. While they were fumbling her phone went off and he dashed to look at it and saw the texts which confirmed she had been with someone else. He was angry and snapped the phone then left but she is claiming that after he looked at the phone he raped her by forcing his penis into his mouth. The policewoman kept checking if any report had come in but it happened in a different police force area and they don't seem to communicate with each other so when she left we were in limbo. It was 10.30pm when the police arrived to arrest him.
I realise I am rambling on but my son and husband don't really want to talk about it and we do not have any relatives nearby. My husband hasn't told his family. I have told my 85 year old Mum but it is hard to take in.
My son's first appearance at court is in July where I think he just pleads not guilty then a trial date is set. There are other things to say but I can hear my husband getting up so I am logging off now and will post more later this evening when he has gone to bed.
My son had been seeing his accuser for a few months and she had stayed at our house and she seemed quite nice. He really liked her although they had had their ups and downs and he was devastated when she told him a few days before the alleged rape that she really liked him but didn't want a serious relationship with him any more. I am very close to my son and could sense something was wrong but he didn't open up until the early hours of the morning when the alleged rape took place. He said he thought she was just scared after a bad experience and she was still texting and talking to him. I said he should just walk away but he said he needed closure and that if he knew she had been sleeping with someone else he could move on. He went to bed and I thought he would be in bed all day as was usual on a Sunday.
My husband and I went out shopping and when we got back his car had gone so I knew where he had gone. He returned just as F1 was starting but went straight upstairs. An hour later the nightmare began when the phone rang and the accusers dad was shouting that my son had raped his daughter and she had put up a fight and he would be covered in scratches. I dashed upstairs and there was not a mark on him and he said "Mum I haven't done anything". I left the phone with him and then my son came downstairs and said her dad had said we would be getting a visit from the police and 2 others. We were in shock and didn't take it seriously but an hour later the accusers dad and another man turned up at our house. We refused to open the door and so while her dad was shouting at the window the other man started smashing my son's car with a scaffolding pole. Her dad then took a crowbar out of their van and I am sure he would have tried to break in if neighbours hadn't then come out so they drove away. We were in shock and shaking but mu husband managed to phone the police and so did my son who had heard the noise and recognised her dad.
When the police came about the car just after 3pm my son gave a statement to the policewoman. He told her he was being accused of rape but he hadn't reaped her , there was just a bit of fumbling which was consensual. While they were fumbling her phone went off and he dashed to look at it and saw the texts which confirmed she had been with someone else. He was angry and snapped the phone then left but she is claiming that after he looked at the phone he raped her by forcing his penis into his mouth. The policewoman kept checking if any report had come in but it happened in a different police force area and they don't seem to communicate with each other so when she left we were in limbo. It was 10.30pm when the police arrived to arrest him.
I realise I am rambling on but my son and husband don't really want to talk about it and we do not have any relatives nearby. My husband hasn't told his family. I have told my 85 year old Mum but it is hard to take in.
My son's first appearance at court is in July where I think he just pleads not guilty then a trial date is set. There are other things to say but I can hear my husband getting up so I am logging off now and will post more later this evening when he has gone to bed.
, but I'll have a go: 
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