Falsely accused during child proceedings...help

[Brokenipad321]

So ive no idea where to start this really.

After a long term relationship broke down with my ex partner, I began proceedings to have the children returned to their respected school and nursery settings.

on the week that my ex partner had the children, following the breakup, I was calling the childten ti speak to them. During these calls she would often tell the children to " **** off" "get ****ed" and theyre " little cunts"

I did manage to obtain a voice recording of her telling our daughter to **** off, get ****ed and absolutely ****ing get ****ed simply because she was telling me that my ex had taught our youngest daughter something, I dont know what that was as she quickly backtracked and said never mind.

I also showed the OIC the CCTV footage of my ex booting my van in and pushing me the night of the breakup, as she alleged she was "fleeing domestic violence"

Having picked the children up, I retained them and advised that court proceedings have begun and that I feel it's best for the children to remain with me in the interim whilst she sorts herself out ( as she had no job, house or stability)

What a stupid mistake that was. Literally that evening a report was made to the local police department. Which was subsequently transfered as it was out of county. (Established this due to police disclosures. However, she did put a counter C100 in which I mentioned in the first interview and was a day or two off the date i suspected these were raised.

first family court hearing went well and I felt good, as the judge had ordered a mutual split of 50/50 and return within a month pending cafcass involvement and pnc checks.

Now two weeks following this I was arrested for three charges, suspision of rape, SA, and Controlling and cohersive behaviour. Totally unfounded and utter bull****.

i was arrested outside of my children's nursery with everybody there, put in a van, and taken home for my house to be searched as my ex has reported I was withholding belongings. Luckily these were given to the solicitors on the first hearing two weeks prior so a paper trail was established as these belongings were sent 24h recorded delivery.

First interview was very vague and this was an initial account which was limited as it simply gave a three year timeframe and accusations of not allowing friends, family etc etc. I want to say I hope they're squashed as as I work 45 hours a week and I'm gone from 0730-1730 all week so I'm unsure how you control someone when I paid for her full driving tuition, three cars, insurances. Tax and she'd keep my card to buy fuel whenever needed. I also mentioned where docs were kept and she knew the pass code and that where the safe keys were kept.

Following her vri a few weeks later, i was brought in for a second interview where my ex is now alleging nearly 80 instances by saying it happened from x year every other weekend for three years. there was three utter bull**** "instances" mentioned which I gave full and frank accounts to what I could remember if we had any sexual encounters on those months alleged, as it's virtually impossible to defend yourself against something when there's no dates times or anything.

Now I'm not happy with myself but I think I said whay a load of bull**** more times in that interview then I care to admit, whilst I'm a laid back placid person. This is literally my life and future on the line from this person's lies and i will fight with everything i have to defend myself

During the period when I retianed the children prior to the first hearing, it was brought to my attention by my daughter that she is receiving Facebook notifications. I advised I would sort this for her, and there was messages from my next door neighbour stating " if there's an open police investigation he'll have the kids taken off him" and "can you report him for anything that doesn't implicate yourself" i handed these to the police and also mentioned discrepancies, as my partner alleged three different years to three different organisations, one year on her court paperwork, the next on the police paperwork, then the next on her cafcass phone call.

I'm sat at about 40 allegations within the family courts, social service visit on the day after my initial arrest as child abuse was alleged, this was dropped after the social worker conducted her visit with NFA. However, this was a ploy for my ex to try and put an urgent C2 application to remove the children back the area she wanted. Luckily this was squashed. Theres also been constant phone calls to police alleging more stuff ( seen via police disclosures). Funny enough a report was made for me giving the bird to my ex partner, and supposedly driving alongside her at that time. Funny enough at that exact moment in time it was alleged I was sat in the solicitors office.

Im currently three months in, with my bail extended to the end of August. However, I was advised I will likely be back in earlier pending my phone data to be reviewed. On the date of my bail extension, the OIC also attempted to sort contact with the children, as I advised her the bail conditions were being used as a weapon to stop all court ordered contact. ( ex trting to set up 3 way calls via herself to have me knicked).. sadly this didn't work but im happy in knowing my children now have their tablets.

She advised there may be another interview, and then it will be reviewed by the DCI who will make a decision to send to the CPS.

I have engaged a very well respected solicitor from reeds who is highly reccomended in pre charge work on the accused.me site, so im hoping the police can see through the absolute rubbish that's coming out of her mouth.

im at my wits end with this all, it's draining, tiring and im broken. I haven't seen my children in nearly 4 months due to this, but we're back in court at the end of the month so im hoping i regain some form of contact, I long to hug my girls i bloody miss them.

My ex is now posting half naked selfies on social media looking for "paypigs" which is literally a physcoligical kick to the brain given the nature of the allegstions she's raised against myself in comparison to the way she's now acting.


Please Tell me theres light at the end of the tunnel because I've been in a very dark place the past few months

[Peter1975]

Hello and a sad welcome to the forum Brokenipad, although I'm sorry you had to find us and to read of your sad situation. Apologies also for the lack of replies until now, unfortunately DM is barely used these days. There are some links to other forums in our useful information section that may offer more immediate support.

There is a lot to unpack in your post but my first impression is you have given a decent account of yourself and your ex is rather over egging the pudding, my feeling is that her scatter gun approach will backfire on her eventually, so let's hope my gut instinct is right.

You seem to be doing all of the right things, gathering social media evidence and so forth and engaging a solicitor for pre charge work may make all of the difference.

My only advice, as it often is, would be to try and look at the situation from all sides and try to put yourself in your ex's shoes. Consider if there might have been occasions or situations you may have handled better yourself or could have de-escalated and perhaps try to pity her rather than get mad. My ex, for example was probably the most difficult when the kids had a great time without her and there was a pretty clear pattern of behaviour there. Other than that, just keep your chin up and doing what you have been doing. There is always light at the end of a tunnel.