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My friend is unsure as to whether he was raped.
My friend recently told me he thinks he might have been raped a few months ago. We were at a talk about rape at our uni's LGBT event. He got really drunk last night, and he got quite angry. I thought it was because he'd seen the guy he's been dating with another guy, but tonight he facebooked me:
"i think in the case of last night i wanted to drink lots to get over the rape talks, i felt kinda angry during the police talk, i should have asked them questions so some anger was probably at myself for not doing so, but i don't want to make that seem a big deal cause it really isn't"
and i asked about it and he said:
"i kept thinking about the time that fat guy sexed me in an alley and the potential rapeyness of that situation, wanted to know more about the laws and specifics of alcohol and consent"
he's gone to sleep now, but I want to have said something by the morning but I don't really know what to say. I've read about supporting rape survivors in the past, but I don't know how to deal with the complexity of real-life situations. I don't know how drunk he was, or if the man asked for consent. From the fact that he's still thinking about it and is unsure whether he gave consent, I feel he probably didn't consent. Can I get some advice about how to ask him about it?
"i think in the case of last night i wanted to drink lots to get over the rape talks, i felt kinda angry during the police talk, i should have asked them questions so some anger was probably at myself for not doing so, but i don't want to make that seem a big deal cause it really isn't"
and i asked about it and he said:
"i kept thinking about the time that fat guy sexed me in an alley and the potential rapeyness of that situation, wanted to know more about the laws and specifics of alcohol and consent"
he's gone to sleep now, but I want to have said something by the morning but I don't really know what to say. I've read about supporting rape survivors in the past, but I don't know how to deal with the complexity of real-life situations. I don't know how drunk he was, or if the man asked for consent. From the fact that he's still thinking about it and is unsure whether he gave consent, I feel he probably didn't consent. Can I get some advice about how to ask him about it?
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