Men and women believe the common myths

[Unregistered - Anna]

Rape is a crime and that is perpetuated on the basis of certain myths surrounding it. What are your attitudes and beliefs about rape and women? Surprisingly, many women, like men, believe the myths associated with rape.

Common rape myths:

• A woman who goes to a man’s apartment on the first date is ready to have sex.

• Any healthy woman can resist a rapist if she really wants to.

• Any woman who goes without wearing a bra or wears tight tops, shorts or skirts is inviting men to rape her.

• In the majority of rapes, the victim is promiscuous or has a bad reputation.

• If a girl engages in ‘necking’ or petting and things get out of hand, then it is her fault if her partner forces her to have sex against her will.

• Women who get raped while hitch-hiking, get what they deserve.

• Women who believe that they are ‘nice’ and too good to talk to on the street ought to be taught a lesson by inflicting rape.

• Women have an unconscious wish to be raped and then lead men on and set up situations in which they are likely to be forced to have sex.

• If a woman gets drunk at a party and has intercourse with a man she has met there, she should be considered ‘fair game’ for other males at the party, who want to have sex with her.

• Sex with a young virgin is good for curing a man’s sexually transmitted infections such as syphilis, gonorrhea, HIV/Aids, and herpes.

[Saffron]

I'm astonished that you think that the majority of people believe these things! Does any honest, normal person believe or think that any of these statements justify rape? these myths have no place or truth in a civilised society. I have never met anyone who would think this justified a rape, and i hope i never do.

[Unregistered - Anna]

Open your eyes. People here believe some of these things.

[Rights Fighter]

I was surprised to read that too. Very odd.

[Saffron]

Open your eyes. People here believe some of these things.

well, I don't believe that anyone who posts here believes the list of "reasons" for rape. Maybe I am judging people by my own standards, but i don't believe any of them justify rape.

however, in the same way that i would never believe rape is "justified", I would never make a false accusation. I think that basically, if you are an honest person, you tend to expect that others will be the same. Unfortunately, people DO get raped, and people DO make false accusations.

And to Unregistered Anna - My eyes are well and truly open, thankyou. I have seen and experienced things I sincerely hope you never will. I have stared at the darkest part of the human soul, and i never want to see it again.

[Rights Fighter]

Maybe unregistered Anna is referring to "here" as being her own world rather than this forum?

Some friends/supporters of false accusers (liars) often really believe the guff they are told no matter how unlikely or impossible. These are the blinkered.

Those of us who have been sexually abused and who have also been involved in false allegations can see both sides. Unfortunately many people cannot see either side unless they have experienced it for themselves. These are also blinkered.

it's a pointless exercise arguing with them because they are unable to experience sympathy or empathy.

[Unregistered - Anna]

I was raped and abused. Can you sympathise or empathise with me?

[Rights Fighter]

Yes I can - so can other members on this forum. It's surprising but you will find that some people who run support groups or who subscribe to supporting those falsely accused have been sexually abused ourselves, as children and/or as adults. Had you read some of the threads you would have seen this already.

[utterlydestroyed]

Yes, I can...

My entire life has now been destroyed, raped and abused by false allegation.

The internalised anger & frustration I feel at not being able to prevent or alter the violating abuse which has occoured to me, my family & friends, primarily due to the false accusation, then secondary to the shoddy, vindictive, homophobic conduct of British police officers.

so, yes, I can empathise...abusive violation, is abusive violation.

[Saffron]

Hi Utterly Destroyed

I agree - my life and my heart were broken by a false allegation. I lost all faith in our police and justice system, and I nearly lost our home and our children. I was referred to a counsellor, suffered stress, heartbreak and depression because of a false allegation. I will never be able to let go of the unbelievable sense of rage i feel at the woman who did this to my family. Most of the time I can now bury it, but i know it is still there, like a cancer in my heart.

On the plus side, it has made me realise a strength that I never knew I had. Before this happened, I thought i wasn't a strong person. Now I know i can weather pretty much anything. I hold those I love close to me, and I always tell them that I DO love them. Just in case I never see them again.

every cloud, and all that.

[Rights Fighter]

Oh Saffron I could weep for you. I know you don't necessarily want that but I do understand the thoughts.

I wasn't emotionally involved with the guy who "got me into this" but I knew he was innocent. I could not believe the lack of care of gathering evidence by police and the hiding of defence evidence by said police. And I cried buckets. Not just for him but the sheer helplessness I felt when I had to watch him sent down to the cells. He literally went grey. He came out on appeal 9 months later. He was one of the lucky ones. Although he wouldn't admit to being "lucky" because it should never have happened in the first place.

The Home Office will not pay compensation because they claim that "a public authority was not negligent". Yes they were - Plod hid evidence.

The case has now been accepted by ECHR. Let's hope it sets a precedent.

[Saffron]

Hi RF
thanks! strange thing to draw strength from, but I do. I also have to say that I think you are an inspiration. thank you for everything you do here, and on the pafaa forum, and soon on the new one. I wish I had known you sooner.
Saffron

[Rights Fighter]

Hopefully you will join the new forum as it is set up specifically for those appealing convictions. Don't be afraid to visit PAFAA from time to time - the trouble makers are now gone.

[Saffron]

I wish your friend luck with his case at the ECHR.
I will definitely join your new site, and try to retrieve my username and password for PAFAA.
thanks for your kind words, it means a lot.