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Received My NFA last night

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  • Received My NFA last night

    Hi all,

    Most will probably never heard of me before, but my story is here


    Just a heads up that I received my NFA last night after six months. At the point I was told, I almost burst into tears at the desk.

    I know I haven't been on here much but have stayed in the background reading a few posts here and there as I felt it was my best way of dealing with it.

    At certain times, I wasn't thinking of it at all and made a normality of my life (in between bails) as best as I could as I had this quite strong inner belief that nothing would happen being that my conscience was totally clear

    My darkest days were the first week after I got arrested where I was scared, mostly in a daze and could not fathom how someone I'd lived with for 9 years could be so cruel, the others being a couple of days before I had to return for bail (I was rebailed twice in the eight months this all took), thinking what if they make a mistake.

    I returned to the police station yesterday as I had it in my head somehow that it was the day I had been bailed to return. When I got there, I was told I was actually bailed till this weekend, however, I had nothing to answer for as no evidence whatsoever of the accusations was found on my phone, tablet and laptop that had been seized and I was free to go.

    I now have today to retrieve my property from the police somehow as I couldn't yesterday and also now have to seriously think of what to do next.

    I'm not bitter strangely enough but strongly feel that women who go around falsely accusing totally innocent men of rape should pay the ultimate price for their false accusations if found out to be so. If this does not happen there will be a lot of men who have to deal with the fear, stigma and life changing experience of dealing with the mess it creates.

    I'm totally fortunate to have wonderful people around me and spoke about it to every one who knew me and was ready to listen. In every case where I did my narrative, the general consensus was Noooooo!! You're not like that, I can't believe this is happening to you. But it did.

    I don't want to go on a rant but from this experience, I know my life or views have changed on women and rape. Yes I know it happens but I will certainly question every case of rape I hear of next.

    I will be here on this site now and again, listening and willing to give advice on dealing with this awful awful situation one can be put in.

    Stay happy as I am today and if you are now, where I've been in the last eight months and innocent. Believe that somehow, the truth will always prevail.

    Now to see if I can get that arrest and **** off my name.
    Last edited by ItsSoEasyToAccuse; 27 November 2013, 07:03 AM.

  • #2
    What great news and thanks for updating; as you mentioned, this will give great encouragement to those still going through the process.

    Please accept a few obligatory dancing bananas
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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    • #3
      that is good news to read!

      And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

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      • #4
        That is fantastic, go on and enjoy your life now

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        • #5
          Thank you all for your kind words and bananas.

          One question I need to ask.

          On my bail cancellation notice, the reason for cancelling my bail is listed as "does not pass threshold"

          Can anyone who knows, kindly explain to me what this means exactly? Google hasn't given me much

          Also, should I be worried still? I was never charged at any time through all this I should add.

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          • #6
            [QUOTE=ItsSoEasyToAccuse;45292]
            "does not pass threshold"

            Hi this means that they had insufficient evidence to charge and they have dropped the investigation. But try to be careful to avoid any future false allegations being made against you as the police will possibly look into this again.
            Here are a few bananas that you deserve for everything you have been through.

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            • #7
              Hi,

              absolutely fantastic, have a bloody fantastic Christmas.

              Regards,

              Ghost....B

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              • #8
                so pleased for you - give yourselves time to heal and then enjoy rebuilding the start of the rest of your lives....here they are....
                "Only love can light the mirror of your soul" - Chris de Burgh

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                • #9
                  Wonderful News

                  Hi there,

                  I am so hopeful when I hear that some one has seen an end to what has been a traumatic journey and to hear such good news.

                  I have followed my friend through her fight with cancer this year and watched her beat it.

                  I am now following my son through his false allegation and trying to stay strong but each day is getting harder

                  God bless you and I hope you have an amazing christmas!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Brilliant news! best Christmas present ever. These are all for you:

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                    • #11
                      Coltay,

                      My only advice I can give from my first hand experience of dealing with this horrible situation you find yourself in is

                      Try not to let it rule or ruin your life.

                      My coping strategy was to not think of it at all and continue as if it didn't happen. I know this may be hard for some to understand or do but it worked for me. I just had this inner strong belief that the truth would prevail. I also had to get my head round to think that I had to trust the police to do a good job as hard as that may sound to some.

                      In the 6 months I have had this hanging over my head, I went on holiday twice as I would normally and I can categorically say that in all the time I was on holiday, looking back, I actually never thought of the case once. Not once!

                      The only times it would pop up in my head was when people would ask of my ex and I tell them what she'd done or a couple of days before I had to return for bail, then my mind would start playing tricks on me.

                      Don't let it dictate how you do things as if you do, the FA is winning in my opinion.

                      If your son remembers things, which I did from time to time. He should write them down and find some proof to back it up if it was something that could help his case and file/keep it somewhere.

                      As a back up for myself, by the time I went to my last bail hearing, I had so much proof to counter the allegations against me (which wasn't revealed to the police by the way) from a back log of emails, documents and letters between myself and my ex about things she'd said to me over the years and done that if they we're revealed in court, I don't think the trial would've lasted a day before it was thrown out.

                      Keep your chin up and I wish you all the best

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