devastated mum

[earthmother]

6 months ago my 17 year old son's girlfriend accused him of raping her; this led to a spiral of other accusations from her friends, a spiteful show of solidarity. This was hugely upsetting at the time and resulted in my son being arrested three times, a string of bail visits to the local police station and his college excluding him pending the result of the investigation (what ever happened to innocent until proven guilty), but we felt confident that it would all be seen a malicious lies and dropped.

On Thursday we attended another bail appointment and he was charged with 2 counts of rape and 2 counts of sexual assault. We are devastated. The worst case scenario is 8 years in prison, the best a plea bargain where he admits to sexual activity with a child (his GF was 15), which results in him going onto the sex offenders register with all of the associated implications including never being able to pursue his chosen career (outdoor education instructor).

There is a lot more to this story than I have included here, but I was hoping this forum could point us in the direction or a. any resources currently available to support the accused (all the attention seems to be lavished on the alleged victims; is it not my son who is the victim of this hoax?), b. any campaigns aiming to decriminalise sexual activity between teenagers.

Please help, this is such a heart breaking time, and we really feel there is nowhere to turn.
Thanks

[Casehardened]

Hi,

The best outcome would be to be found Not Guilty of these allegations!

Best not to go into details as anyone can read this forum but the crux of the matter is whether he had (and admitted in interview) sexual intercourse with his girlfriend, this isn't clear from your post.

If he did, then technically it is rape as his girlfriend was not legally able to consent, even if it was consensual.

If he didn't, then don't let him admit to something he didn't do , though presumably there was some kind of sexual contact between them.

In either case do remember your son is only 17 and the jury most likely will be composed entirely of parents who would be very hard-hearted to convict a young lad for accusations made by a very slightly younger girlfriend, provided he can show a reasonable motive for her and her friends to make these accusations. Most parents will be realistic and realise that some youngsters do experiment sexually earlier than 16 but this doesn't usually lead to accusations of misconduct and police involvement.

If he pleads guilty then, as you rightly say, there is no way back from this.

[smokiejo]

Hi I feel your pain my 17 year old has been accused of raping his 16 year old girlfriend they was together for 10 months and a couple of weeks ago she accused him was terrible had the police come at 6 in the morning took all his bedding clothes etc and match him off to the station he is out on police bail waiting to see if they will charge him. It has been the worst 3 weeks of my life here if you want to chat xx

[whatsgoingon?]

Hi,

In either case do remember your son is only 17 and the jury most likely will be composed entirely of parents who would be very hard-hearted to convict a young lad for accusations made by a very slightly younger girlfriend, provided he can show a reasonable motive for her and her friends to make these accusations. Most parents will be realistic and realise that some youngsters do experiment sexually earlier than 16 but this doesn't usually lead to accusations of misconduct and police involvement.

If he pleads guilty then, as you rightly say, there is no way back from this.

Welcome to the forum - CH is absolutely right in what he says (again!) - Please don't let him plead guilty to something he didn't do, it'll ruin the rest of his life. Make sure he's got a solicitor who specialises in false accusations - you'll find a list under general information. Having been down that route with my son, I can't stress how important it is to be properly defended. Also, he's entitled to have his detention record (there's a proper term for it which slips my mind) he should ask for this from the station where he was arrested.

It's a very hard time for you - both of you , but you probably appreciate the seriousness of the allegations more than he and the possible consequences. One of the possible outcomes is that it doesn't ever go to court or if it does that he's found not guilty so that's worth striving for.

Easier said then done, I know, but try not to be overwhelmed by it all - you need to keep as level headed as possible and still enjoy the good things in life.

[smokiejo]

Hi earthmother how are things going we gave just had bail excetened 😢