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Oh my goodness everyone - I am completely overwhelmed by the so lovely comments and messages you have written for me Thank you so much - has made me feel all warm and fuzzy.
I can't believe the change in me - I sing and whistle while walking my dogs and around the house and keep yelling, "I'm free....." after 21 and half months of thinking I would be spending the rest of my life in prison.....
I couldn't have done this on my own - I have had so much support from everyone here - you're all marvellous.
For those of you still going through it - never ever give up. I was suicidal February 2013 - but so glad I never went through with it - what a waste it would have been.......
Keep strong and thank you all so much"Only love can light the mirror of your soul" - Chris de Burgh
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Hi wgth and acc - thank you so much for your good wishes - never thought I would see the bananas.....
Whatsgoingtohappen - I really feel for you and the length of time you have been waiting. So similar to mine though - I was not arrested or bailed either. Quite early on someone on here said in one way it's a good thing because plod aren't putting much store by it; on the other hand - because they're not - it's not a priority so won't be in any hurry to look at it. That person was right!!!!
I got so desperate that I went to see my MP and asked him to intervene on my behalf which he did and we got a response from both police and cps. Doing this made me feel more in control and proactive. if you have a good local MP maybe you could try the same.
Keep believing in the truth and trying to keep the other parts of your life going and as "normal" as you can. MH"Only love can light the mirror of your soul" - Chris de Burgh
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Originally posted by myhome View PostHi wgth and acc - thank you so much for your good wishes - never thought I would see the bananas.....
Whatsgoingtohappen - I really feel for you and the length of time you have been waiting. So similar to mine though - I was not arrested or bailed either. Quite early on someone on here said in one way it's a good thing because plod aren't putting much store by it; on the other hand - because they're not - it's not a priority so won't be in any hurry to look at it. That person was right!!!!
I got so desperate that I went to see my MP and asked him to intervene on my behalf which he did and we got a response from both police and cps. Doing this made me feel more in control and proactive. if you have a good local MP maybe you could try the same.
Keep believing in the truth and trying to keep the other parts of your life going and as "normal" as you can. MH
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Originally posted by whatsgoingtohappen View PostI try my best ,anxiety attacks akimbo,cold shudders every morning ,googling prison life..It's ok my wife saying pah! don't worry .thats easier said and done.It still feels afresh as it did 19 months ago..mines historical ..one of those report within a year things pre 2004,with a fantastical tale thrown in to try and seal the deal of a police stat.Yep ive had those thoughts what would i think of on y way down if i jumped off this bridge.i want to move forward ,excuse the typing errors ,my space bar is cream crackered"Only love can light the mirror of your soul" - Chris de Burgh
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Originally posted by myhome View PostWell - 21 and half months since the interview I got an email from the OIC yesterday saying the CPS are taking NO FURTHER ACTION AGAINST ME!!!! I had to read it several times to believe it.....I'm floating somewhere up in the stratosphere at the moment and loving it.... thank you all for you enduring and fantastic support over all this time......love and hugs Myhome
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Been there ... still there
Sorry to here about this. I'm a bit further down the line that you are... but still in the same place.
You will experience a range of emotions (including fear and anger), don't act on them. Wait and allow the rational, problem solving part of your brain to work it out. You are inocent, remind yourself of this regulary.
Keep active, walk the dog (or someone elses) as the exercise releases endorphins (natural) that will make you feel better.
You cannot do your primary job role but you can do a secondment or back office role instead. Be at the office doing something. If there are training opporunities available then take them, keep your career on track.
I understand the frustration, do I ever. The CPS runs on geological time scales and not the immediate exit you desire.
It's nowhere near as bad as you think it is. The self-defence part of your brain has built the 'worse possible scenario' and is using that as it's frame of reference. You must re-program that belief system, "I am inocent and this will get sorted out."
Now is the time to lean on your friends, they won't mind.
Regards,
VtO
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Hi VictimtoOffender (puzzled by your user name)
I'm a bit puzzled by your post and not sure which post you answered.......I'm the OP and after 21 and 1/2 months was NFA'd.......
if you have answered another post maybe you could post on the OP thread?"Only love can light the mirror of your soul" - Chris de Burgh
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Botched
Originally posted by myhome View PostHi VictimtoOffender (puzzled by your user name)
I'm a bit puzzled by your post and not sure which post you answered.......I'm the OP and after 21 and 1/2 months was NFA'd.......
if you have answered another post maybe you could post on the OP thread?
Victim to Offender relates to my own case. I called the police when my ex rammed my car four (4) times. She then claimed I'd raped her three (3) times over the past two (2) years. Thus I went from Victim to Offender in one (1) lie.
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2 years ago......
So - 2 years ago to-day my world was turned upside down by the "invite" to have a little chat with the local plod, and 2 years ago Saturday we had that chat which was one of the most horrendous things I have ever experienced.
I have survived the 2 years with so much support from sooooo many people. But at what cost? It is apparent to me that just because I (or anyone) got the NFA, the emotional turmoil, distress and trauma does not just disappear. How many times have I posted here to other people, "Please don't underestimate the time it will take you to recover from your dreadful experience..." so why can I not apply that to me? I can't - no matter how hard I try.
After a long chat with my soulmate at work (I'm the same age as her mum!!!!), I'm going to seek some professional help to get my head unscrambled cos I just don't seem to be able to do it on my own....
But, I guess my overwhelming message is, that, even though I'm not yet at the place I wan to be - I survived......and so can you. To everyone on here who has helped me every step of the way, from the very bottom of my heart - THANK YOU .......MH xxxxxxxx"Only love can light the mirror of your soul" - Chris de Burgh
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