Just accused of Rape

[marconious]

On saturday night I ended up leaving the pub with a women. We went back to her's and slept together. Everything seemed fine until I had a guilt trip and stated I wasn't going to return again ie this was a one off. She went crazy saying she wasn't a one night stand and ended up saying to me she would call the police and say I raped her.

I have just left the police station after being held for 20 hrs, had 2 interviews, one of which was them telling me what she had said. I can't believe this is happening to me. I don't know what to do. I'm on bail right now awaiting there decisions but is there nothing I can do right now???

[allatsea]

Hi,

can't offer much real advice at the moment as there isn't much to give, but just wanted to say welcome to the site. Stay here through all of it and you will get tremendous support. This is a familiar theme, I'm afraid. With my son it was the girl not wanting her boyfriend to find out she'd slept with someone. All you can do now is wait. Whatever you do don't try and contact her and don't put anything up on networking sites like facebook as the police will try and use anything against you. They will only be concerned at this stage with trying to get evidence aginst you - not trying to get anything to prove your innocence. While it is still fresh in your mind write everything down - times and location, anyone who saw you together etc.

Stay strong,

allatsea

[why_me]

Really sorry this is happening to you marconious!

allatsea has given you some great advice there. Under no circumstances enter into communication with this woman. I hope you had a solicitor present during your interviews. If not get one asap!

Have you been bailed to return at a further date or just released without charge? As you will learn by reading through the many posts here, too many women cry rape for a variety of reasons. So just keep a clear head and fight this with everything!!

Good Luck!!

[0990]

Sorry you find yourself here , have you been represented by a specialist solicitor at times the duty one isn’t up to the task . Unfortunately there’s not much you can do at the moment but wait .
The processes is very slow with the police just gathering statements from you both , this in turn will be relayed to the cps who will decide if the case goes too court .
I know the waiting is terrible but you need to stay strong , this is a great place for advice or just to moan

[A RUINED LIFE]

welcome to hell want my advice go to a doctor get yourself on high dosage of anti depressants as well does not matter how long you will have to repay get the best lawyer dont say anything to anyone .......................................the police are very very very cunning and take pleasure in ruining peoples life bullies and i feel even more sorry for you if your jewish muslim asian or black its like triple points i have been going through the same **** since febuary lost my life slow treck into hell i take HIGH DOSAGE OF ANTI DEPRESSANT only thing that does not make me jump and NO i didnt do it is what makes it worse im a diffrent religion to the racist anti semitic police in my country i swear remind me of nazis .............LIVING ON A VERY NARROW BRIDGE

[A RUINED LIFE]

Don't speak to anyone not anyone until you have spoken to your lawyer and nowdays they can listen to your iphone even when its turned off even

[Saffron]

Hi Marconious and welcome.

The other members are right - there isn't a great deal that you can do at the moment apart from wait. However, I would recommend that you start writing down everything you can remember about the night in question - every single tiny detail. Not just how you met, but what you had to drink, who you spoke to, what you did (visiting a shop/cashpoint etc) what she drank while you were with her, who saw you together (incl taxi drivers/people you passed in the street, etc). Even the smallest detail could be significant.

I'm sorry you find yourself here and I hope your ordeal will soon be over.

[felix]

Hang in there, dear friend. This may take months not weeks. Write down everything from the moment you set eyes on her to when the police got involved. Any detail - anything. Including the sex - don't worry if it reads like a bad novel. Every details - about her, clothes, body, words she used, her property, contraception, what she said about parents, ex's etc etc, anything you can think of. Let it flow, don't worry about order or neatness. Sign and date every page, photocopy them, and then send one to a decent specialist lawyer - not the duty solicitor. You can ask on here if you don't know of one.

We have all been here or know someone who has. We are here to help!

Felix

[marconious]

Hi all,

thanx for the advise. I have carmed down a little now but I just can't believe this is happening. I'm not even aloud to enter my own village as she lives there. I have managed to get the names of people who can give statements to the events leading up to us walking to her house house together. So do I pass these onto the police or my solicitor? I'm seeing a solicitor tomorrow who has tried these kinds of cases before so hopefully that will help me a little. I have never in my life harmed a women or child and never would but the police seem to not care in the slightest. I was even told today she has been seen walking around with her hair all nicely done up, well dressed waving to her friends like nothing has happened. Is this really how a women acts when she has apparently been brutishly assaulted and raped. I just can't forgive myself for allowing myself to be talked into leaving with her. I know better. My life is on total hold now and theirs nothing I can do.

This is the first time she has cried rape however it isn't the first time she has lied about men who made it clear after sleeping with her that it was a one night stand. From my understanding of what people are telling me she isn't sweet and innocent like she is making out to the police at all. I can't say anymore as I don't want to get in anymore trouble with the police. This is the first time I have ever been in trouble with them and I just feel helpless. I do hope they see her for who she really is.

[felix]

Can't emphasise enough the need to get a toughie and super expert solicitor. Mine was fantastic - kept telling me to pull myslef together and treat this as all out war with everyone being a 'hostile' except her until proved otherwise. Don't trust the police, however kind or nice they are. They are on her side and want a conviction. I would pass nothing to the police. I would not talk to, phone and certainly not attend any plod station without full solicotr presence. Pass all info onto the solicitor - it is up to him what to tell plod.

[Saffron]

Felix is 100% correct. Do not give anything that might help your case to Plod. Make copies of it and keep it in a safe place - preferably with your sol and definitely NOT at your home. If you haven't yet instructed a sol give copies to a friend - one that you trust!
Chin up. Hopefully this will all be over soon.

[IvorBinWronged]

Feel for you Buddy.

I was really happy to see a good amount of great advice following your post. To add, I must say that plod is only concerned with gathering evidence to pass to the CPS. They weren't there in the room with you two so they just do a job. If you give them evidence, they will include it in their file. You'll no doubt be under police bail conditions. Make sure that you adhere to them and when you visit the station whether it's twice a week to sign in or just to re-new your bail conditions, ALWAYS be polite to the custody sergeant. Make sure that you fill your time with useful pursuits - press-ups, sit-ups etc. Get yourself into shape because if you do go to jail, your do better to be in shape - you'll have at least six months to do this now. Besides which, keeping physically fit will keep your mind fit too and that is the biggest battle. Keep sane and before you know it, you'll be handed a piece of paper which says that the CPS has deemed that there is insufficient evidence to provide a realistic prospect of conviction which means that you'll never get a full pardon but you're not going to jail either. Good luck from the bottom of my heart.

[Raptorace]

Hey buddy
You've had some good advice here so I won't add to it. But I will say try and relax about it, you've done nothing wrong and as you will note from this site most cases are NFA d so stay positive. If you can't cope then get to the doctors. This he'll you've been put in will pass. It's a nightmare but you WILL get through it!!

[billykickass]

Hey mate
Im going through a similar situation too only happened a couple of days ago as well so if it helps if feel the same such an emotional rollercoaster that i wish could all just be over. so i cant offer any advice but if it helps to know someone else is feeling your pain as well hopefully we will get throught this and get on with life. good luck and i will keep you informed if anyhting happens to me or any good advice i get.

[marconious]

Well its been a long time since I posted on here. I'm in court and tomorrow is my last day. So far its hard to see how its going. I have to go on the stand tomorrow then 1 more defense witness and guilty or not guilty. Lost my job, girlfriend, house and pretty much everything but my family so I guess at least I have something. Lets hope all goes well tomorrow.