Not guilty verdict!

[mummabear]

I am the mother of a falsely accused young man. I have been reading this forum for the past year and a bit and have not registered or commented up until now but I have taken comfort in reading the stories where justice has been done. I had to come on and tell you all that we got a Not Guilty verdict as I know it will give hope to someone somewhere.

You bring your sons up to behave and not break the law so that they will never find themselves going through the justice system with the potential of having their lives ruined. As the mother of sons I warned them about the dangers of drugs and too much alcohol and avoiding getting into fights and a whole litany of potential dangers. Not for one minute did I think that I had to warn them against a damaged girl telling lies. I must not get on my soapbox but long story short, after 15 months of hell, we got a Not Guilty verdict at trial.

I believe the police service is abysmal and not fit for purpose and is totally biased against the males in this situation but I have faith that the legal system works. So to anyone going through this and especially any other mothers, feeling helpless and hopeless, keep going, there is an end to the nightmare and the legal system works.

[carrot tops]

Congratulations!

Sending you a hug as one mum to another. We too were victims of terrible lies but got our not guilty a few years ago. My faith in the police and CPS is rock bottom but my faith in common sense of ordinary people is pretty high.

I feel so sorry for men and boys in the presumed guilty climate we live in.

Hopefully the tide will turn and we will see convictions of those who lie and unbiased police investigations in the future.

It takes quite some time recovering from all of this so I wish you all the best in the recovery phase. It has a huge impact on the whole family not just the falsely accused.

[Franticwithworry]

Hello mummabear. I'm so glad that you found help and support on the forum - and got the correct result in the end. Lurkers are of course very welcome, but thank you so very much for actually posting your son's verdict. Good news is such a boost for those still living this nightmare.

Carrot tops is right - it can take quite some time to recover from an ordeal like this so please, you, your son and family, continue to be gentle with yourselves in the coming weeks and months. Some people find the verdict quite an anticlimax and not quite the end of things in the way they had hoped. Not everyone, but be aware that we are still her if you need continued support.

One favour to ask - would you let us know the names and firms of your son's legal team if you are willing to recommend them? We have a special thread for that and it would be good if they could be included here. Put them in this thread and I'll see they get added to the recommendation thread if you like.

Congratulations to you all. It's a marathon task to deal with a trial and you must all be exhausted. I hope you can find some time to celebrate, even if only quietly.

Here are the customary bananas -

[mummabear]

Thank you, franticwithworry, I take all your kind words on board. And thank you so much for our dancing bananas! I cried when I saw them as that is what I was holding onto and praying we would get when I was reading from this forum in the wee small hours and feeling so desperate. Sounds silly but they are symbolic of the end of a nightmare. It is still very early days for us.
I absolutely will recommend our solicitor because he was fantastic and so caring too. I will put it in the recommendations section.

[Pond31]

Congrats on the not guilty verdict. It is nice to hear good news from members. Every victory is a step in the right direction. One day we will have a fair and balanced system in place.

Pond31

[mummabear]

Congratulations!

Sending you a hug as one mum to another. We too were victims of terrible lies but got our not guilty a few years ago. My faith in the police and CPS is rock bottom but my faith in common sense of ordinary people is pretty high.

I feel so sorry for men and boys in the presumed guilty climate we live in.

Hopefully the tide will turn and we will see convictions of those who lie and unbiased police investigations in the future.

It takes quite some time recovering from all of this so I wish you all the best in the recovery phase. It has a huge impact on the whole family not just the falsely accused.

THANK you very much, carrot tops. It really is the whole family that is impacted by this dreadful situation but obviously it’s the worst for the falsley accused boys. I am glad to hear that you got the right outcome, too. Can I just ask you if your son is effected still by the ordeal? Thanks again.

[mummabear]

Congrats on the not guilty verdict. It is nice to hear good news from members. Every victory is a step in the right direction. One day we will have a fair and balanced system in place.

Pond31

Thank you, Pond 31. Thank you especially for the dancing bananas. I think that the tide is beginning to turn.

[carrot tops]

I would say he is still affected and his trial was 2014.

I'd say he bottled up his feelings for a long time and hasn't had any sort of counselling over it. He is a very empathetic person and his false accuser was his adopted sister so that adds another level of complexity. I think he underplayed his feelings to try and protect me. He is now with a lovely girlfriend and I hope he is opening up to her.

For a long time I felt I had lost him as he was repressing his feelings when we used to be close. I am getting him back now but do have concerns that at some stage he is going to have to revisit a lot of repressed feelings.

[mickw]

It was over 4 years since my trial and found not guilty. It has not gone away, I still lay awake some nights going over it in my mind.
Mickw

[carrot tops]

Do you mind me asking what sorts of thing bother you mickw ?

[mickw]

Hi carrottops,

I don't mind at all and if my story helps anyone it would be great. There is no one thing that keeps me awake really, just the whole nightmare keeps returning. Maybe my story will explain it better and it can be found at.

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...ght=#post67420

Mick

[carrot tops]

Just read your story. Absolutely chilling.

Our ordeal pales to nothing compared to what you have been through. If the general public could read your story it would open their eyes to things that most people are oblivious to.

I found I felt on edge for a long time if I saw a police car and would find it hard to be in the same room as a social worker. It is also so tough when a family member is the false accuser. The people you should be able to trust are unsafe. I relate to the whole notion of the falsely accused being guilty until proven innocent.

I wish you better times ahead, physically, mentally, emotionally and financially.

[mickw]

Thank you, carrot tops I really think that if I got through what I did then everyone has a hope. Just keep fighting and believing.

Mick

[mummabear]

It was over 4 years since my trial and found not guilty. It has not gone away, I still lay awake some nights going over it in my mind.
Mickw

Hi mickw and thank you for sharing that. I am so very sorry to hear you are still suffering, it’s so unfair. My son has come down from the “high” of being acquitted and is now saying he doesn’t feel right and is scared all the time. I have looked into psychologists who deal with trauma/PTSD as I just don’t know what else to do and I don’t want her to damn well ruin the rest of his life.

[mummabear]

I would say he is still affected and his trial was 2014.

I'd say he bottled up his feelings for a long time and hasn't had any sort of counselling over it. He is a very empathetic person and his false accuser was his adopted sister so that adds another level of complexity. I think he underplayed his feelings to try and protect me. He is now with a lovely girlfriend and I hope he is opening up to her.

For a long time I felt I had lost him as he was repressing his feelings when we used to be close. I am getting him back now but do have concerns that at some stage he is going to have to revisit a lot of repressed feelings.

Hey carrot tops, thanks for your reply. I remember reading your story on here months ago, what an ordeal for all of your family. Underplaying his feelings is exactly what my son does, to protect me. When it was still going on he said that the worst thing of all was what it was doing to me and believe me, he didn’t have any idea of how badly it was frightening me because I always had my game face on in front of him as he didn’t need to be worrying about me. I am glad your son has found someone nice, I am sure that will help him a lot.