how to i suport a depressed partner?

[gucci]

im new to this site, but jist of it is my girlfriend suffers from depression, we have been together for 20 month both still married to ex's that can only be described as bitter bitter b*"@#rds i can handle this as my son is old enough to make his own mind up but my girlfriend has three young kids (50/50 access) but are being menipulated by father to turn against her

, 2 young ones seem ok at the mo but older one is getting brainwashed by him, got social services and docs involved but because of the stigma of her depression she feels they are siding with him and thisis dragging her into a bottemless pit mentaly

, she was reacently hospitalised due to latest self harm, wich I'm ashamed to admit i took personally and told her it was over as i was a ''pull yourself together !##$'' after discussions with her family and my own, a have seen the l now understand she cant help this as it is an illness she cant control and started to learn more about her illness but still find it a struggle as we live 100mile appart and she has to go through this alone most days ( this is the killer for me as i know she self harms and cant help it as she is not aware she is doing it.

I know i cant help her only she can do that with the professional medical help and right medication which is now in progress but till the pills kick in an psychiatric help takes affect,,, how do i support her without patronizing her ????? i really want to be there for her through the darktimes but protect myself too

[Faith]

You can support her by being patient but a certain degree of firmness must come into play too.
Advise her to make a call to the Samaritans...this is totally anonymous.
I assume she has spoken to her GP?

[gucci]

after her self harm we managed to get her committed to a psychiatric ward were she stayed on a voluntary basis for 2 weeks, she now has a physiatrist, physiologist and she has got an advocate to go with her to meetings with social services, solicitors, ect... her docs are testing her for Asperger's now but the waiting game now begins as all these things take time to fall into place and that’s the thing that frustrates her, I can see light at the end of the tunnel but she cant, there is only so often I can say to her ''it wont always feel like this'' it is a learning process for me and reading about depression is so hard in one way to find so so many people have the same frustrations as me but in another so heart warming to find I am not alone