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I noticed in your original post and subsequent ones that you make mention that "women do lie" and the like - I know you didn't mean anything untoward by this (you were simply commenting on your own situation) but in the interests of fairness I would also like to point out that it isn't just women that lie about sexual allegations for all sorts of reasons, including financial gain.
TBG1
Yes, apologies, I should choose my words more carefully, having read several examples on here of people being accused by men. In fact a male friend of mine went to court last year, falsely accused by a man of rape.
Thanks a lot for your reply, I am thinking positively generally, but also feel I need to plan ahead a little for every eventuality.
I'm sorry that you're going through this hell. And from reading your post, I can tell that's where you are right now.
In many ways, it's good that you are thinking about the practical things such as property and pets etc., - Lots of people, including those on this forum, say that you shouldn't burden yourself with the "what if I go to prison" thoughts at this point....and they're right to do so....but sometimes I don't think it's a bad thing to acknowledge the seriousness of the situation that you (we) find yourself in.
Having said that, in general terms there is little (practical) value in "preparing yourself for the worst" at this point simply because (a) You might be informed that No Further Action will be taken or (b) If you are charged, it still remains for you to be found guilty of something you haven't done. At the very least, if you are charged, I would estimate that there is a minimum of a year from now until your case would be heard so any plans you make now would have to be too "fluid" for them to be worthwhile.
It doesn't hurt to consider these things (I know I have) and to do so might even help by way of focussing your mind off of your situation. But do hold off from actually putting any plans in motion - there is every likelihood that they won't be needed - but if the worst happens (charge) and you've already "put your affairs in order", the mindset that that will give you (almost resigned to the worst-case-scenario) won't be very helpful to you when the fight begins.
I noticed in your original post and subsequent ones that you make mention that "women do lie" and the like - I know you didn't mean anything untoward by this (you were simply commenting on your own situation) but in the interests of fairness I would also like to point out that it isn't just women that lie about sexual allegations for all sorts of reasons, including financial gain.
Try to remain positive and please do comment on people's threads - you might think you have nothing to contribute, but you'll be surprised at how much simply engaging with someone who can empathise with your situation can help.
Best Wishes,
TBG1
Indeed, and I hope that I didn't give the impression that I or we are taking a defeatist attitude. Perhaps I should just clarify that we aren't doing anything at the moment in practical terms that we don't need to do anyway, and that everything else is a 'do at charge' thing or an effort to avoid making important decisions under great stress.
Perhaps I should have said 'prepare for the worst and plan for the best' because we are being anything but defeatist. We aren't relying on hope at all, and that's not what I meant either. :-)
'Mongolian Warriors had the courage of lions, the patience of hounds, the prudence of cranes, the long-sightedness of ravens, the wildness of wolves, the passion of fightingcocks, the keenness of cats, the fury of wild boars and the cunning of foxes.' BE A MONGOLIAN WARRIOR WHEN DEFENDING YOUR INNOCENCE!
Indeed, and I hope that I didn't give the impression that I or we are taking a defeatist attitude.
Far from it FWW .... I think your post was spot on - I have no doubt that Ariadne will think so and I have to say it was very useful to me too...which simply confirms my final comment in my previous post to Ariadne that he should definitely try and contribute to other people's posts because (much like yours) anything that is said might also be helpful to others.
Far from it FWW .... I think your post was spot on - I have no doubt that Ariadne will think so and I have to say it was very useful to me too...which simply confirms my final comment in my previous post to Ariadne that he should definitely try and contribute to other people's posts because (much like yours) anything that is said might also be helpful to others.
Thanks Again & Best Wishes,
TBG1
Thank you too, TBG1. I'm a bit paranoid about accuracy, clarity and truth these days, so I sometimes read things into stuff that isn't there. I dare say we all get a bit like that at times in these circumstances. Best wishes to you as well.
'Mongolian Warriors had the courage of lions, the patience of hounds, the prudence of cranes, the long-sightedness of ravens, the wildness of wolves, the passion of fightingcocks, the keenness of cats, the fury of wild boars and the cunning of foxes.' BE A MONGOLIAN WARRIOR WHEN DEFENDING YOUR INNOCENCE!
One month and 8 days and it's all over. So relieved but what an eye opener. No more one night stands for me. I'm going to stick around to support others on here, as this forum was so informative. Chris was really helpful to talk to though. No charge so I've been through nothing compared to others here, but it still caused me such worry and upset. So happy today.
One month and 8 days and it's all over. So relieved but what an eye opener. No more one night stands for me. I'm going to stick around to support others on here, as this forum was so informative. Chris was really helpful to talk to though. No charge so I've been through nothing compared to others here, but it still caused me such worry and upset. So happy today.
And I am really happy for you!
Here's to a wonderful future for you and your girlfriend - and I think that no more one-night-stands is a really good idea.
'Mongolian Warriors had the courage of lions, the patience of hounds, the prudence of cranes, the long-sightedness of ravens, the wildness of wolves, the passion of fightingcocks, the keenness of cats, the fury of wild boars and the cunning of foxes.' BE A MONGOLIAN WARRIOR WHEN DEFENDING YOUR INNOCENCE!
Great news on the NFA. A No Crime no longer really carries the weight it used to. Like an NFA they can be resurrected should further "evidence" come to light.
I would ask your solicitor about that though as you might still want to proceed with it.
Great news on the NFA. A No Crime no longer really carries the weight it used to. Like an NFA they can be resurrected should further "evidence" come to light.
I would ask your solicitor about that though as you might still want to proceed with it.
Thank you. I'm just going to get on with my life, I think..relieved, a little more cynical, a lot more careful and much less judgmental.
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