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Thread: Age old accusation

  1. #1
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    Default Age old accusation

    Can you guys help I am new to the site so I don't know where to start . My partner and I have known each other for 15 years although only just become an item as such and we have been as happy as we can be taking things slowly. On Sunday evening we got a call from a DC from a different area, the area in which my partner came from 15 years ago. He stated he wanted to arrange an interview as there has been an allegation of sexual assault on a person He gave the name of the so call person and stated this happened 26 years ago in a place where my partner stopped working in 1990. He stated he would call with an appointment in two days but alas no call as come up to know.

    This is hurting us both as we are like treading on egg shells its the not knowing why someone has accused him 26 years later, he does not know the girl in question .. what the hell do we do now?. What do we expect? They say its an interview What happens then ? Any help would be grateful

    Kind Regards

    Worried

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    Default Age old occusation

    I think I have posted in wrong area could some one repost to the right place please

    regards

    Worried

  3. #3
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    Hello and welcome to the forum, (I've moved your post to the most appropriate section though I appreciate that the accusation is of sexual assault rather than rape)

    The most important advice is to have a solicitor present at the interview who is experienced in defending false sexual allegations, the link below gives some member's recommendations. It is best to select one local to the area where the assault is alleged to have occurred as I guess your partner will be 'invited' to a police station there to be interviewed.

    Do take legal advice before mentioning the discrepancy in the dates to the DC; the police will be obliged to re-question the complainant about this and they may well then make a fresh statement incorporating the 'new' dates with the explanation that the trauma of the incidents caused the memory issues!

    http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...ist-solicitors
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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    Default Age old accusation

    Quote Originally Posted by Casehardened View Post
    Hello and welcome to the forum, (I've moved your post to the most appropriate section though I appreciate that the accusation is of sexual assault rather than rape)

    The most important advice is to have a solicitor present at the interview who is experienced in defending false sexual allegations, the link below gives some member's recommendations. It is best to select one local to the area where the assault is alleged to have occurred as I guess your partner will be 'invited' to a police station there to be interviewed.

    Do take legal advice before mentioning the discrepancy in the dates to the DC; the police will be obliged to re-question the complainant about this and they may well then make a fresh statement incorporating the 'new' dates with the explanation that the trauma of the incidents caused the memory issues!

    http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...ist-solicitors

    At present the police suggested they will come to our local area but as yet still no contact. The alledged event was in Midlands and was whilst doing voluntary service with lots of people there and we are in the South East.

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    Hi and sorry you are going through this.

    My partner's alleged offences took place in a different county from where we now reside, the police had to get permission to come here and arrest him and then took him back to their own station to interview. Not sure if they all do it like this.

    They took his phone, I don't know if it is likely in your case. If they do come and get him it would be advisable to have a bit of cash with him so he can find a way home if they don't offer him a lift.

    As for after interview, in our case my partner was put on bail and given a date to return to the station in three months time to find out if they'd made a decision to charge, nfa or rebail to continue their enquiries. Unfortunately it can be a long and horrible wait before 'progress' is made, fingers crossed it's not too long for you.

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    Hi there. I'm sorry you had to find us but glad you did. Casehardened's advice is spot on - it's important that you have a specialist solicitor at the interview. There are lots of recommendations on here on the sticky thread. There is a little bit of flexibility when you are 'invited' for interview and there is a bit of time to prepare.

    There seems to be a lot of variation in how the different police forces deal with distance. Though my man was arrested, the officers came from a long way away but took him to a station local to us for questioning. That seemed a lot more sensible than taking him miles away and then leaving him to make his own way home, but common sense is a bit thin on the ground in these cases.

    Solicitors are quite used to being asked about things and then not being needed, so my suggestion is to choose a solicitor in both your home area and the area the questioning police are from, but let them know the full situation, that is that you don't know where or when yet you will be questioned, but that you will likely need them at short notice depending on what the police want.

    That way you have all eventualities covered. It's a long road you are embarking on I'm afraid, and the solicitor you choose for this initial interview needn't be the one you stay with ultimately, if that's not convenient.

    By 'you' I mean your partner, but this forum is here for both of you. It's a horrible trauma to go through and it's no wonder that you are distraught and treading on egg shells with each other. There is no logic to many of these complaints and it's dreadful to be at the mercy of a system so heavily weighted to imaginary victimhood, but you will both get through it, and these feelings of panic do subside. Honestly, they do. Be kind to yourselves and don't expect too much of yourselves or each other for the time being.

    It takes time to achieve some level of recovery and to get used to this event being a part of your lives.
    'Mongolian Warriors had the courage of lions, the patience of hounds, the prudence of cranes, the long-sightedness of ravens, the wildness of wolves, the passion of fightingcocks, the keenness of cats, the fury of wild boars and the cunning of foxes.' BE A MONGOLIAN WARRIOR WHEN DEFENDING YOUR INNOCENCE!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Witchypoo69 View Post
    At present the police suggested they will come to our local area but as yet still no contact. The alledged event was in Midlands and was whilst doing voluntary service with lots of people there and we are in the South East.

    Where is your local area? I ask as I might know of a decent solicitor who can attend the interview with your OH
    Chris Saltrese Solicitors - private client only: ~ Email: amy@chrissaltrese.co.uk or sarah@chrissaltrese.co.uk ~ ~ Telephone: 01704 535 512:

    Private forums for those maintaining innocence of HISTORIC sexual offences: http://www.pafaa.org.uk/wordpress/?page_id=729

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    Default Age old accusation

    Quote Originally Posted by Rights Fighter View Post
    Where is your local area? I ask as I might know of a decent solicitor who can attend the interview with your OH

    My area is Grays Essex

    Kinds Regards

    Worried

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    Default Age old occusation

    Quote Originally Posted by Thingscouldbeworse View Post
    Hi and sorry you are going through this.

    My partner's alleged offences took place in a different county from where we now reside, the police had to get permission to come here and arrest him and then took him back to their own station to interview. Not sure if they all do it like this.

    They took his phone, I don't know if it is likely in your case. If they do come and get him it would be advisable to have a bit of cash with him so he can find a way home if they don't offer him a lift.

    As for after interview, in our case my partner was put on bail and given a date to return to the station in three months time to find out if they'd made a decision to charge, nfa or rebail to continue their enquiries. Unfortunately it can be a long and horrible wait before 'progress' is made, fingers crossed it's not too long for you.

    Thank you for the good advice I didn't even think of that not that I can think of much at this moment. I hate feeling that I aint in control

    Kind Regards

    Worried

  10. #10
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    Contact this lovely fellah http://www.freemanssolicitors.net/si...ile/harvey_fox and he will sort you out. Ring him tomorrow though as it's a bit late now.
    Chris Saltrese Solicitors - private client only: ~ Email: amy@chrissaltrese.co.uk or sarah@chrissaltrese.co.uk ~ ~ Telephone: 01704 535 512:

    Private forums for those maintaining innocence of HISTORIC sexual offences: http://www.pafaa.org.uk/wordpress/?page_id=729

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rights Fighter View Post
    Contact this lovely fellah http://www.freemanssolicitors.net/si...ile/harvey_fox and he will sort you out. Ring him tomorrow though as it's a bit late now.

    Thank you that's the first thing We will do in the morning. I have been reading some of the information on your very informative site ... whats frustrating to know is you appear to be doomed if you do and doomed in your don't. My understanding is that my partner being a fully qualified nurse although not been nursing in hospitals/nursing home a job he absolutely loved since 2002 since then he was private nursing for my family. Last CRB cleared 2005, This means he is on a register whether nfa or aquited
    but the girl gets away scott free where is the justice ? have I got this right?

  12. #12
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    Default Age old accusation

    I have another question for you guys When my partner goes to the interview does he get shown a picture of who he is suppose to have done the deed alledgely? If no that means any one can do this?

    Kind regards

    Frustrated

  13. #13
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    Unfounded allegations can be damaging to anyone that works with the public or requires DBS clearance but a voluntary interview does not mean automatic disclosure as far as I am aware. The police obviously have to decide on any risk to the public but they do this on a case by case basis.

    Freemans also deal with employment law so ask the brilliant Harvey Fox tomorrow.

    Is your partner in a union at all? They may provide legal services to members.
    Consider carefully what you post in public. To join secure closed forums for those falsely accused of historical sex offences visit :http://www.pafaa.org.uk/wordpress/?page_id=729

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    Quote Originally Posted by Witchypoo69 View Post
    I have another question for you guys When my partner goes to the interview does he get shown a picture of who he is suppose to have done the deed alledgely? If no that means any one can do this?
    It is up to the police what to disclose before interview, I would doubt they would show a photograph but your solicitor will try and push for as much information that could help.
    Consider carefully what you post in public. To join secure closed forums for those falsely accused of historical sex offences visit :http://www.pafaa.org.uk/wordpress/?page_id=729

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    Quote Originally Posted by Peter1975 View Post
    Unfounded allegations can be damaging to anyone that works with the public or requires DBS clearance but a voluntary interview does not mean automatic disclosure as far as I am aware. The police obviously have to decide on any risk to the public but they do this on a case by case basis.

    Freemans also deal with employment law so ask the brilliant Harvey Fox tomorrow.

    Is your partner in a union at all? They may provide legal services to members.


    He isn't in a union now but I am however was at the time again of the alledge event he was with Royal college of Nursing.

    I am a union rep and a welfare officer (Not that you would think so at the moment with the waterworks. (harder to do with your self than members) so that was done this afternoon now just waiting.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Witchypoo69 View Post
    He isn't in a union now but I am however was at the time again of the alledge event he was with Royal college of Nursing.

    I am a union rep and a welfare officer (Not that you would think so at the moment with the waterworks. (harder to do with your self than members) so that was done this afternoon now just waiting.

    Is he not still eligible to join a union? If he still has his nursing and midwifery council pin code, I don't see why he couldn't join up to the union online. I'd recommend unison over the royal college of nursing however.

  17. #17
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    Default Age old accusation

    Unfortunately his pin code lapsed in 2009 By this time he was looking after members of my family and couldn't cover the cost of the pin which I was not awareoff. I don't think he can join a union being unemployed now ...if only

    Any advice grateful

    Worried

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    Quote Originally Posted by Witchypoo69 View Post
    Unfortunately his pin code lapsed in 2009 By this time he was looking after members of my family and couldn't cover the cost of the pin which I was not awareoff. I don't think he can join a union being unemployed now ...if only

    Any advice grateful

    Worried
    I'm in a similar boat, although not quite qualified yet. First thing I did was sign up with them. Could be worth phoning them up and seeing if there is anything that can be done, surely they must have experience with ex-nurses who's pins have lapsed.

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    As far as I know you can join Unison even when unemployed. I might be wrong, but it's worth checking out.
    'Mongolian Warriors had the courage of lions, the patience of hounds, the prudence of cranes, the long-sightedness of ravens, the wildness of wolves, the passion of fightingcocks, the keenness of cats, the fury of wild boars and the cunning of foxes.' BE A MONGOLIAN WARRIOR WHEN DEFENDING YOUR INNOCENCE!

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by WronglyAccused View Post
    I'm in a similar boat, although not quite qualified yet. First thing I did was sign up with them. Could be worth phoning them up and seeing if there is anything that can be done, surely they must have experience with ex-nurses who's pins have lapsed.
    As being out of the Nursing game for some length of time looked in to this earlier this year. He would have to go to university for at least six months and bee in practice which he is not. I have been trying to rack my brains on how to help him and failing miserable in my eyes. I have got him to list all females since the year dot or seems like it any thing since the time date given what else can I do?. If I don't stop with all this I fear what may happen in the future

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    Default Age old accusation

    Will I ever stop thinking about this or worrying about the future?.... My partner will be chatting soon to you guys I think

    Thank you guys for all your help in this matter since I have posted ... Finally feel like we can confine in you guys and that some one is listening and not making judgement which I feel will happen soon enough.


    Regards

    Tearful

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    Default Age old accusation

    Quote Originally Posted by Franticwithworry View Post
    As far as I know you can join Unison even when unemployed. I might be wrong, but it's worth checking out.
    I am the unison rep but I will have to check out whether unemployed etc ... I haven't heard of this but definitely whether checking. I know that once joined you have to be a member for at least for weeks before they can help but again definitely worth checking.

    Thanks for your help

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    Quote Originally Posted by Witchypoo69 View Post
    Will I ever stop thinking about this or worrying about the future?.... My partner will be chatting soon to you guys I think

    Thank you guys for all your help in this matter since I have posted ... Finally feel like we can confine in you guys and that some one is listening and not making judgement which I feel will happen soon enough.


    Regards

    Tearful

    It will get easier with time. This journey you have just embarked on is a long one with lots of ups and downs. The best thing you can do is be strong for your partner and show your support to him, worry about the future when it comes to it, tiny steps. The waiting is agonising, but once the interview has been completed you will know more about what you are up against, and start the fight back, until then try to remain calm and positive, easier said than done I know.

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    Quote Originally Posted by WronglyAccused View Post
    It will get easier with time. This journey you have just embarked on is a long one with lots of ups and downs. The best thing you can do is be strong for your partner and show your support to him, worry about the future when it comes to it, tiny steps. The waiting is agonising, but once the interview has been completed you will know more about what you are up against, and start the fight back, until then try to remain calm and positive, easier said than done I know.

    I am trying really I am..... fighting tears now


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    Hang in there Witchypoo.

    Most of these cases (around 80%) don't go beyond the investigation stage so there is always plenty of hope. There are regular NFA's in the groups.

    I can't tell you not to worry but I can advise you to try and take your mind off things and try not to look too far ahead, at least until you know more. Try to carry on with life as best you can and just deal with things as they come up.

    You have an advantage in finding the groups at an early stage and you already have the number for a great solicitor who will give you some much needed reassurance.

    We will be with you every step of the way
    Consider carefully what you post in public. To join secure closed forums for those falsely accused of historical sex offences visit :http://www.pafaa.org.uk/wordpress/?page_id=729

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    Quote Originally Posted by Peter1975 View Post
    Hang in there Witchypoo.

    Most of these cases (around 80%) don't go beyond the investigation stage so there is always plenty of hope. There are regular NFA's in the groups.

    I can't tell you not to worry but I can advise you to try and take your mind off things and try not to look too far ahead, at least until you know more. Try to carry on with life as best you can and just deal with things as they come up.

    You have an advantage in finding the groups at an early stage and you already have the number for a great solicitor who will give you some much needed reassurance.

    We will be with you every step of the way


    Stage one spoke with Harvey Fox seems like a nice fella. True to his word he promised to keep us in the loop ,

    Now it feels more real


    At this moment I don't feel like actually talking to any one just feel numb

    Regards

    Witchypoo

  27. #27
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    Unhappy Age old accusation

    Still no news except the police officer who is dealing with this and was going to come back in two days hasn't to find he is not in the office till Monday...,Grrrrrrrrrrrrr why didnt he say he was away? Do they like to help you on tenderhooks?

    Trying to be supportive but every time I open my mouth I feel I am causing my partner to recline. He is getting quieter by the day Not that he really says too much to any one. He has always been like that

    Sorry don't help had a crappy day at work too

    Witchypoo

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    After the dc email was contacted and an out of the office message come saying they were not about until Monday our solicitor got a message on Saturday saying they had booked their train for Wednesday and hope to be with our local branch of police about 11. If he hadn't contacted them when was they going to confirm it with us the night before?

    My partner tells me that when he spoke to this Dc he stated we want to interview you... you wont be arrested..... what do we deduce from that? still if it was that bad he wouldn't be still stinting here.

    Can I ask once the interview takes place what's the next procedure? Is this when he gets a record? Are newspapers told of this?

    I have tried to go about the normal run of duties over the weekend and then heard from solicitor who said he had heard from dc yesterday they were adament that it was Wednesday when solicitor wanted it on Thursday then I remember I have an appointment on Wednesday that requires me to have to have someone with me after having eye drops .. I did no more and copied my appointment letter for proofs now we wait

    My partner is a little distance though he says his not but there you go. My partner has remembered an incident that happened with colleagues back in about 1976 ish where a friend pinged this ladies bra my partner standing behind this lady at the time she lashed out and gave a back hand to his private area not realising it wasn't him I asked if he could remember the ladies name but came and yet he can remember the guys name but that was some 15 years further back could this be accused as an assault?


    This really does play with your mind


    Witchypoo

  29. #29
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    This link is a good description of the implications of a voluntary interview (but note it isn't an endorsement or otherwise of that particular firm of solicitors, just that they came top of the search list!)

    http://www.maplessolicitors.com/poli...ry-interviews/

    Obviously there will be a write-up on a computer somewhere about the interview but a formal entry on the PNC won't be made unless he is arrested. Even if there is a reporter outside the police station, someone walking in of their own volition is hardly newsworthy.

    Advise him to look on this visit as a job interview; be alert, cautious, put himself over well, but not frightened, after all he has done nothing wrong!
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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    Welcome to the forum.

    As someone who has just come out of the other end of this ordeal. A few pointers If I may.

    As every one else here has said, legal advice is a must.
    The police may appear to be jovial with your other half, acting as though they are his best friend and it's just a little issue they need to clear up. However now days the police instantly believe the victim, as per their investigative guidance.

    Don't be rude to them or arrogant but do be aware that they're their to secure a conviction and in turn probably a promotion or pat on the heat from their superiors.

    At this stage; if you have any, Do not hand any evidence to the police, at best they will ignore it and at worst they will use it to get the false accuser to change their story.

    My overriding advice here would be that this could take days or it could take years to resolve. But as hard as it is you have to live a normal life. Part of the ordeal is being broken down, when that happens you need to build yourself up.

    Remember, a ship is safe in the dock but that isn't what it's built for.

    You can do This!

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