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There months post NFA and still says like this

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  • There months post NFA and still says like this

    It's been three months since our 14 month ordeal has been over. Basically was speaking with my step sister today talking about streses we've had in our relationships and I mentioned hubby went through a a tough time last year and she kept asking why.

    We have an extremely close relationship and speak about confidential stuff all the time so I told her the story and she basically came up with reasons why FA could be telling the truth I told her the witnesses and the others FA accused and she just went quiet and said well I wont spread it around or anything.

    Heartbroken not sure we can have a relationship going forward been in such a good place too this FA keeps getting me.
    Who you become while you are waiting is as important as what you are waiting for -Nicky Gumble

  • #2
    It's saddening to read this Lilyput, but I try to think back before I became aware of how prevalent FAs are. I had literally no idea that anyone would concoct a false allegation; the whole idea was beyond my understanding. On the forum we are all too well aware of false accusations, but for those lucky people who are blissfully unaware (so far), the whole concept may be difficult to get their head around. I hope on reflection, and given some time, your step-sister will be able to comprehend what happened. It isn't her fault that she doesn't get it straightaway -.who would?

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    • #3
      Unfortunately there are people who will always say "there is no smoke without fire". You can be found not guilty or the CPS could decided NFA but they will still say that there was just not enough evidence. If you watch some of the new wave feminist videos on youtube there are those would think that FA never lie and that men are guilty just because they are men. I am sorry that your relationship with your friend has been damaged but unfortunately you never know how people are going to react.

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      • #4
        Hi lilyput

        Sorry to hear this, it is very sad but 18 months post NG trial I can identify with this. As has been said there will always be no smoke without fire line of thought. I truly believe unless you have been through a FA of this nature you would never totally understand what it is like. It is life changing. There are still people in my life outside of my close knit circle that I haven't been able to talk to about this. Life will,get easier for you as time passes as it has for us. Hopefully you will have a relationship with her, she will be shocked as before this happened to us I would have been shocked listening to it and don't know how I would react but it's a difficult one. I always think only if you have full facts and how you have had to fight to defend and prove the lies will you ever truly know the truth, who would think someone would make a false accusation many reasons money jealousy compensation the list is endless.

        Try not to worry as it's a lot for someone to take on board she didn't live through the horror of it like you. You know the truth it wasn't took forward so she should realise this and not question it. Hope you can sort it out. The main thing is for you and your family to move forward x

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        • #5
          I'm so sorry to hear this lilyput. Some people find the prospect of false accusations unthinkable and it ruins relationships.

          That said, it might just possibly be that your stepsister was just thinking aloud and will, in the end, draw different conclusions when she's had time to think things through properly. I hope so anyway. There has been enough damage and you've had enough to cope already with without this too.
          'Mongolian Warriors had the courage of lions, the patience of hounds, the prudence of cranes, the long-sightedness of ravens, the wildness of wolves, the passion of fightingcocks, the keenness of cats, the fury of wild boars and the cunning of foxes.' BE A MONGOLIAN WARRIOR WHEN DEFENDING YOUR INNOCENCE!

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