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Son aged 24 falsely accused of raping his ex partner

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  • Son aged 24 falsely accused of raping his ex partner

    I am devastated, his new fiance is devastated and we are terrified. after 8 months of being told the case was no way going to go to court due to too many inconsistencies in her statement and the fact she has made allegations about 3 previous boyfriends he was called by his police case worker and told he would be charged. we went to preliminary hearing at magistrates court where his charges were read out and a case set to start in 6 weeks in crown court. a year and a half of pure hell. never a day goes by that we can say it has not overshadowed any signs of happiness.
    With all the evidence we now have access to prosecution witness statements but can't discuss for obvious reasons I cannot conceive how he will be convicted but that doubt is tearing my heart apart day by day. not doubt about my boys innocence but doubt that justice system will let us down.
    the fact she is happily getting on with her life and perceived as a victim and telling anyone who will listen to the point my son has been pushed in town, glared at and I am sure would have been threatened if not for the fact it may affect her story.
    thankfully we still have regular access to my grandson though she made it clear in one message to me which threatened to take that away if i did not change my plans and babysit for her on new year! yes she really is that nasty!
    the only time I got really angry was at the preliminary hearing when she was called only by "the victim" My son is the victim in this. it is him who's life could be ruined even more because of her lies!
    I KNOW my son I KNOW he is innocent. PLEASE GOD LET THIS NIGHTMARE BE OVER SOON SO WE CAN ALL SLEEP AT NIGHT AGAIN!

  • #2
    Hi and welcome to the forum,

    I have moved your post into a separate thread so that responses will be individual to you.

    Did any of the three previous allegations get to court?
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

    Comment


    • #3
      Hello and welcome to the forum- it is always sad though when we get new members as that means yet more victims of a false accuser is having their lives turned upside down.

      She sounds like a very nasty manipulative individual, but having said that most of them are- that's how they arae able to carry on while the rest of us are plunged into the darkest place we will ever probably visit.

      I can't help with anything legal, all I can do is say you will find loads of support on here. The only advice I would give is NOT to trawl the internet looking for other cases etc as each one is individual and it will drive you mad!!

      It is a horrible horrible situation to be in but you are not alone- we can all relate to your fears and frustrations.
      I hope it all goes well and that the truth will out
      They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Casehardened View Post
        Hi and welcome to the forum,

        I have moved your post into a separate thread so that responses will be individual to you.

        Did any of the three previous allegations get to court?
        NO she never pressed charges but had told 5 people who are being called as witnesses, one event was supposed to have occurred at age 13 and her dad allegedly walked in on what was happening and walked out again. her parents are deeply religious, jehovahs witnesses. her dads first words to my son when he first met him were "hi I am the man you will have to deal with if you ever hurt my daughter. but they disowned her afterwards for not following their beliefs and having a child out of wedlock. one friend of hers retracted her statement made after police travelled 200 miles to take it. she just said she felt bad for my son and she thought her friend of 20 years was a pathological liar and had an attack of conscience.

        Comment


        • #5
          Are you feeling confident with the solicitor he has? That is so important and even more important is getting the right barrister.
          People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

          PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

          Comment


          • #6
            hi

            Originally posted by muminturmoil View Post
            I am devastated, his new fiance is devastated and we are terrified. after 8 months of being told the case was no way going to go to court due to too many inconsistencies in her statement and the fact she has made allegations about 3 previous boyfriends he was called by his police case worker and told he would be charged. we went to preliminary hearing at magistrates court where his charges were read out and a case set to start in 6 weeks in crown court. a year and a half of pure hell. never a day goes by that we can say it has not overshadowed any signs of happiness.
            With all the evidence we now have access to prosecution witness statements but can't discuss for obvious reasons I cannot conceive how he will be convicted but that doubt is tearing my heart apart day by day. not doubt about my boys innocence but doubt that justice system will let us down.
            the fact she is happily getting on with her life and perceived as a victim and telling anyone who will listen to the point my son has been pushed in town, glared at and I am sure would have been threatened if not for the fact it may affect her story.
            thankfully we still have regular access to my grandson though she made it clear in one message to me which threatened to take that away if i did not change my plans and babysit for her on new year! yes she really is that nasty!
            the only time I got really angry was at the preliminary hearing when she was called only by "the victim" My son is the victim in this. it is him who's life could be ruined even more because of her lies!
            I KNOW my son I KNOW he is innocent. PLEASE GOD LET THIS NIGHTMARE BE OVER SOON SO WE CAN ALL SLEEP AT NIGHT AGAIN!
            I hope it soon is over for you. Some women do this, they just want the attention it brings and for everyone to feel they're a victim. Shame this friend of hers couldn't stand up in court and tell everyone what she thinks is more likely. Best of luck, I hope things go the right way for you.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Rights Fighter View Post
              Are you feeling confident with the solicitor he has? That is so important and even more important is getting the right barrister.
              yes te solicitor has been great and very reassuring, has met with my son regularly and gone through all witness statements most of which were her friends from work that she had only known a couple of months but she was telling them thatmy son was being abusive and thats basically all of their statements contain.
              Thanks for all of your support I am so scared my son is such a gentle loving caring person and a fantastic father to his 4 yr old. I obviously have to consider the impact it will have on my grandson also if this all goes wrong for us and they believe her lies. will i still get access to my grandson and what rights will his new partner have as she is more of a mother to him than his own mum is. they get married in 3 weeks

              Comment


              • #8
                I'm really sorry to hear yet another person going through this.

                There is so much support here, everybody understands the nightmares, the fear, the feeling of unfair treatment, everything you and your family will go through.

                I hope you feel confident with your legal team and they have experience with these kind of cases.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by muminturmoil View Post
                  yes te solicitor has been great and very reassuring, has met with my son regularly and gone through all witness statements most of which were her friends from work that she had only known a couple of months but she was telling them thatmy son was being abusive and thats basically all of their statements contain.
                  Thanks for all of your support I am so scared my son is such a gentle loving caring person and a fantastic father to his 4 yr old. I obviously have to consider the impact it will have on my grandson also if this all goes wrong for us and they believe her lies. will i still get access to my grandson and what rights will his new partner have as she is more of a mother to him than his own mum is. they get married in 3 weeks
                  I married my husband whilst we were going through it and although the happy day may feel tinged with a slight bit of sadness please make sure they enjoy themselves. It was the best feeling for me basically declaring I will by his side no matter what happens and there was so much love and happiness from family and friends it was wonderful!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by karmaiscoming View Post
                    I'm really sorry to hear yet another person going through this.

                    There is so much support here, everybody understands the nightmares, the fear, the feeling of unfair treatment, everything you and your family will go through.

                    I hope you feel confident with your legal team and they have experience with these kind of cases.

                    we have never had any experience with courts or the legal system so we are just basically doing as instructed and maintaining a dignified silence while she is free to tell the world her side apparently. The truth will out. solicitor said they can't wait to put her on the stand and take her story apart as they can't believe it has gone this far either. she has made a more recent statement saying she doesn't want to give evidence with anonymity a advised but wants to face my son in court so she can move on with her life whether he is convicted or not! her exact recorded words were if ****** goes to prison or not I just want all this behind me so i can get on with my life!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by karmaiscoming View Post
                      I married my husband whilst we were going through it and although the happy day may feel tinged with a slight bit of sadness please make sure they enjoy themselves. It was the best feeling for me basically declaring I will by his side no matter what happens and there was so much love and happiness from family and friends it was wonderful!
                      they have chosen to have a very private wedding with just myself my grandson, his fiances sister and a friend as witnesses. they don't want any fuss just to be married and when this is all over we can have a reception with friends and family and hope they will understand why they wanted to do it this way. trying to distract ourselves from thinking about this 24/7 I have just had a holiday and changed my car and trying to keep occupied which was impossible at the start when we just sat in the house and cried, fretted had little sleep all tinged with an underlying anger at the injustice of it all. the fact he had to spend even one night at the police station is a travesty!
                      I wish he would agree to press charges against her but he says he just wants it over. I think she shuld be locked up for what she has done to my family, a family that took her in off the streets literally, fed clothed and nurtured her as a mother should. how could anyone turn on people who have been so kind to them?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by muminturmoil View Post
                        .........................
                        ...............

                        I wish he would agree to press charges against her but he says he just wants it over. I think she shuld be locked up for what she has done to my family, a family that took her in off the streets literally, fed clothed and nurtured her as a mother should. how could anyone turn on people who have been so kind to them?

                        Pressing charges against her while he is waiting for trial would be a complete waste of time, as he's not yet proved that she is lying.

                        I do hope he has a good solicitor and barrister
                        People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                        PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          yes I meant he should press charges against her if justice prevails and he is proven innocent. we have also been told they may look at the evidence and he will be acquitted on day one. has anyone else been told this at any point and does anyone know if it has ever been the case as we have found we have been told conflicting stories so many time over the last year n half

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Whoever told you that is raising false hope. I can happen but it's quite rare.
                            People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                            PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by muminturmoil View Post
                              I am devastated, his new fiance is devastated and we are terrified. after 8 months of being told the case was no way going to go to court due to too many inconsistencies in her statement and the fact she has made allegations about 3 previous boyfriends he was called by his police case worker and told he would be charged. we went to preliminary hearing at magistrates court where his charges were read out and a case set to start in 6 weeks in crown court. a year and a half of pure hell. never a day goes by that we can say it has not overshadowed any signs of happiness.
                              With all the evidence we now have access to prosecution witness statements but can't discuss for obvious reasons I cannot conceive how he will be convicted but that doubt is tearing my heart apart day by day. not doubt about my boys innocence but doubt that justice system will let us down.
                              the fact she is happily getting on with her life and perceived as a victim and telling anyone who will listen to the point my son has been pushed in town, glared at and I am sure would have been threatened if not for the fact it may affect her story.
                              thankfully we still have regular access to my grandson though she made it clear in one message to me which threatened to take that away if i did not change my plans and babysit for her on new year! yes she really is that nasty!
                              the only time I got really angry was at the preliminary hearing when she was called only by "the victim" My son is the victim in this. it is him who's life could be ruined even more because of her lies!
                              I KNOW my son I KNOW he is innocent. PLEASE GOD LET THIS NIGHTMARE BE OVER SOON SO WE CAN ALL SLEEP AT NIGHT AGAIN!
                              Muminturmoil,

                              You sound like you're having a tough time.. (But receiving great support from this community)

                              I'm a film-maker, currently researching a short-form documentary about false accusation - it's not for TV...

                              I can appreciate that this must be a very difficult time but the power of the work I'm trying to create needs the thoughts and reflection of somebody going through all of this in real time. I wondered if perhaps you'd be comfortable chatting to me - phone or Skype or facebook or something - in total confidence. I'd really appreciate it.

                              Tim

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