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  • #16
    Again, we can all relate to those feelings. As already mentioned, make notes, a timeline, anything you can think of that might be relevant, to help you feel as though you have some control over this awful situation. Talk to your GP . Sometimes just holding hands or a brief hug can make all the difference.
    They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

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    • #17
      Get help

      Originally posted by heartbreaking View Post
      Thank you for your words of strength. I just can't settle. Im living on my nerves. My partner has also has a full breakdown from the stress. it's just useless I feel useless. I just hang onto the fact no charges have been brought to him. ....yet
      I know exactly how you're feeling and it's so bad.
      My husband is the same, but we're a little further down the line.
      His GP was great and my husband is currently receiving some therapy which so far has helped him.
      If you haven't already then I thoroughly recommend that you do.
      My husband hasn't been charged yet either, some 4 months since voluntary interview!
      Get some help for yourself too if you feel you are not coping.
      Things do get a bit easier I promise. The initial shock takes a while to recover from.
      Give yourself plenty of time.
      Keep in touch.
      We can help each other

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      • #18
        Originally posted by YearsOfHell View Post
        My husband hasn't been charged yet either, some 4 months since voluntary interview!
        When I was at that stage I found from somewhere in the PACE procedures that the police should charge with an offence as soon as there is sufficient evidence to do so (after consultation with the CPS if appropriate i.e. if they are unsure)

        As the allegation is false where is this evidence going to come from if they haven't already got it? Presumably the unsupported word of the complainant is not considered sufficient evidence for a charge?
        'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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        • #19
          In our case there was no evidence, they used collaborated stories to convict. (Apparently this is no longer used in England- outlawed in the '80's) However it is still alive and well in Scotland. In today's climate there seems to be very little evidence required to charge. You just have to keep believing in your own integrity because the legal system rarely has any.
          They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

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          • #20
            Do you mean corroborated stories? No need for that here in England either. The allegation is enough.

            What I cannot understand for the life of me though, is why they NFA somebody where there is clear evidence that he's probably done it, or some of it, but in other cases only the word of the complainant is enough for it to go to Charge. Possibly that's due to how strong the complainant is (in the CPS view) and if he or she can stand up to cross-examination.
            People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

            PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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            • #21
              The "evidence" they have is false but that didn't stop them! I just don't know where else this can go.the police have 5 statements one being his. The police rang his brother in law and asked over the phone! No statement taken as he's on our side. Very professional! the solicitor said they might not even come to me or his exe , who is also pleading his innocents or his family!!
              I just don't know where the police can go to further this investigation! ???

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              • #22
                Originally posted by Casehardened View Post
                When I was at that stage I found from somewhere in the PACE procedures that the police should charge with an offence as soon as there is sufficient evidence to do so (after consultation with the CPS if appropriate i.e. if they are unsure)

                As the allegation is false where is this evidence going to come from if they haven't already got it? Presumably the unsupported word of the complainant is not considered sufficient evidence for a charge?

                Some people are sat in prison having been convicted on the unsupported word of the complainant. At the end of the day, it really is down to who the jury "like" the most.

                A judge in summing up such a case will say: "Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, you have heard the evidence. There is no more. In this case the only evidence that there is, is what the complainant says and what the defendant says. It is up to you to decide who is telling the truth, who is the more credible witness".

                With that, an innocent person can be sent to prison for a very long time - or for the rest of his life.

                Or, if the jury preferred the evidence of the defendant, he could go free, and if he was guilty, he could walk out of that court room and go an commit the same sort of offence again.
                People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                • #23
                  hi

                  Originally posted by heartbreaking View Post
                  Thank you for your words of strength. I just can't settle. Im living on my nerves. My partner has also has a full breakdown from the stress. it's just useless I feel useless. I just hang onto the fact no charges have been brought to him. ....yet
                  Nothing is ever useless. The one thing you must NOT do is give up.

                  I wish I could give you some of my strength. Let your feelings settle and see if there is anything you can think of that will strengthen your case. You'll find you're not useless

                  Stay strong, you'll be amazed what you can do

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                  • #24
                    Hi Heartbreaking

                    Sorry to hear your current circumstances, there appears to be striking similarities in your case to what my family went through 2 years ago. The shock is immense, having your partner excluded from your home and having social services land on your doorstep within a matter of hours is extremely traumatic.

                    It is still very early days, the police do not work quickly, they do things at their own pace. Getting through a false allegation is very much an endurance test. This forum is an excellent place to vent your feelings and receive support and advice from others that have walked this road before you.

                    The first few weeks can be the hardest due to the shock and confusion, it will get better and you will get through this.
                    The truth is like a lion. You don't have to defend it. Let it loose. It will defend itself.

                    St Augustine

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                    • #25
                      Hello heartbreaking. I too had to attend voluntary interview under caution for something historic ,me and my wife don't have children,but apart from that im in a similar situation.Regarding the timescale iv'e been waiting 27 months to hear something and as of yet i hav'nt.It's hard,but as previous posters have said looking on the internet for comparable cases and the outcome's makes things worse.I try not to do that now but have phases where i do.Hope you get an outcome soon

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                      • #26
                        I spent last night with my partner at his parents house while my parents had the children.... I cried lots and lots and lots.
                        the solicitor said it was unusual that he wasn't arrested after the interview which lasted less than an hour. He said its usual a longer time in the interview room. He is waiting for the case notes as we have moved solicitors and then he says he's chasing it up as there shouldn't be many routes to investigate with it being so historic and no other accusations have been made. We can but hope! His exe who he has a child with is also fighting his corner and on a positive note we have become friends. Which I think speaks volumes

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                        • #27
                          RF I think that sums it all up very well. In our cases there was no evidence but the stories, which they had made up at the bus stop, were all similar. My case was dismissed after the first "witness" was heard which I believe was to stop any more damage to the prosecution case against my other half. His defence team were horrified by the verdict but said it could be purely down to the fact that we're ENGLISH!!! Two of the jurors even fell asleep!!!
                          They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

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                          • #28
                            It comes from my own experiences of the "justice system" since 2000, when a friend of mine was wrongly convicted, released on appeal in 2001 (police hid evidence and then lied about it, saying they were never given it in the first place) and by the end of 2002 I had started supporting people and working on appeals........
                            People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                            PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                            • #29
                              My partner has written a time line and has actually gone to see an old friend who could act as a statement in his defence as they spent lots of time together when the accusations have come up. He's building his case when though there is no charges as of yet. I'm very proud of him today he's worked really hard 💓

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                              • #30
                                Well done- I'm sure it must feel like a massive positive step. Just.......keep going.
                                They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

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