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  • Accused

    I've been reading this site for a while now, and I've decided to register and say hello.

    I have recently been falsely accused of rape by my ex-partner. I don't want to go into too many details just in case she is reading this (that's how scared of her I am.)

    The short story is that I foolishly had consensual sex with her (she instigated and guided the whole thing), after which she called the police and accused me of rape. I was held for almost 24 hours before being bailed to return in two months. I gave a full and frank account of what had happened (a pretty embarrassing thing to do.) I haven't been charged.

    I am terrified that she will be believed, and I'll end up in prison for something I haven't done. And rapists aren't exactly popular in prison.

    I have no idea how women can get away with such things. I understand that the police have to investigate every rape allegation but the system seems biased against the alleged perpetrators.

    Anyway, that's the long and short of it.

  • #2
    Originally posted by scared111 View Post
    The short story is that I foolishly had consensual sex with her (she instigated and guided the whole thing), after which she called the police and accused me of rape.
    Hi and welcome to the forum,

    You are correct in that anyone can view these posts without registering so best not to go into detail.

    Nevertheless reading between the lines, you were already separated from your ex when she engineered a conciliatory reunion which turned out to be a set-up so that she could accuse you of rape.

    The key to your defence is to establish her motive; only you can guess at this but the common ones are issues over custody arrangements (if there are children) jealousy over a new relationship, or wishing to stay in the [shared ownership] property, all of these can be solved by the accused being sent down.

    However should the matter get as far as a trial, if you can demonstrate to the jury the reasons why a previous loving partner has turned against you (assuming of course that you haven't actually done anything to wind her up!) they are likely to be sympathetic to you on the basis they might identify with your plight.

    There is some general advice in this link which may be useful:

    http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...at-happens-now
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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    • #3
      Thanks for that. I had even suggested to her prior to the meeting that this was some kind of trap for this very purpose. Turns out I was right. It now basically comes down to my word against hers. My friends and family are all very supportive but it's still very hard to live a normal life with something like this hanging over me.

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      • #4
        hi

        Originally posted by scared111 View Post
        Thanks for that. I had even suggested to her prior to the meeting that this was some kind of trap for this very purpose. Turns out I was right. It now basically comes down to my word against hers. My friends and family are all very supportive but it's still very hard to live a normal life with something like this hanging over me.
        I can only agree with you. It's been nearly 9 weeks now since I had my interview and I've lost my job, all on the lies of my false accuser. It is hard, the only thing we can focus on (although it is hard sometimes) is the fact that we are innocent and just HOPE that the system and (if it comes to it) the courts can recognise the truth when it's in front of them. People normally do.

        Keep believing and stay strong!

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        • #5
          Originally posted by jittery View Post
          I can only agree with you. It's been nearly 9 weeks now since I had my interview and I've lost my job, all on the lies of my false accuser. It is hard, the only thing we can focus on (although it is hard sometimes) is the fact that we are innocent and just HOPE that the system and (if it comes to it) the courts can recognise the truth when it's in front of them. People normally do.

          Keep believing and stay strong!
          Thanks. I'm trying to be strong, but I have very dark moments where I fear the worst.

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          • #6
            chin up

            Originally posted by scared111 View Post
            Thanks. I'm trying to be strong, but I have very dark moments where I fear the worst.
            Well again that's only natural, I'm known for having strong nerves, but I have moments when I worry the worst may happen; after all, sometimes it does and there's no escaping that fact.

            All I can say is try to push these fears to the back of your mind and just carry on as best you can.

            Chin up and stay strong!

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