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One final kick in the teeth

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  • One final kick in the teeth

    Hello all

    I shall give some background to my story: I work at sea on a Sail Training vessel with young people and whilst I was back on leave I got into a relationship with a girl I used to know when I was younger, She had a child from a previous relationship who was 5 months old at the start of our relationship.

    I did everything I possibly could for this woman and she was what I would describe as emotionally ( and on 2 occasions physically) abusive towards me, I had a phone out on contract for her and was also giving her money because she'd told me she was pregnant.

    I found out she was lying about the pregnancy as well as a whole raft of other things and called the relationship off, my friend went to pick up my stuff (including the contract phone) as I was away at sea for a few weeks. 3 weeks after calling it off my friend rang me to say that the police had been round to pick up the Phone and wanted to speak to me, I rang them and they said that they wanted me to attend the police station on a voluntary bases (so they could arrest me) to answer an allegation of a sexual nature.

    I attended the police station and before my interview was handed a non-molestation order witch contained a statement from her, in the statement she accused me of many things stating that I raped her numerous times (she gave only 3 specific dates and said she couldn't remember the rest), That I made up she was pregnant, That I kept saying her current son was mine and many other things, basically whatever you would imagine an abuser as she wrote down.

    Her statement to the police was pretty much the same although there were differences and she said I'd raped her on a date I wasn't with her, I knew this as I had gone through all the text messages between us and used them to work out exactly when we were together. I told the police that I had evidence on my phone which would disprove her claims and gave my phone to them (the evidence being all the text messages since the start of our relationship, with her talking about being pregnant and asking me for money e.t.c).

    I was arrested and bailed for 6 weeks, work suspended me on full pay as I work with young people and said that they will support me through this and that it didn't matter how long it took they'd have me back.

    At the end of the first six weeks the bail was extended for a further six and when I asked the police why they stated that "we have the information of your phone, which obviously backs up what you're saying, but do not have the information of the phone you had on contract for her as the sim has been removed and blocked and we have had to send it to a specialist unit"

    The bail ended on yesterday and I was informed on Thursday that "due to the evidence you presented us we believe you are innocent and we are taking no further action" when I asked when I would get my property back I was informed that I could get my phone back next week but that I can't get the other contract phone back as she'd said it's hers!!! I can prove it's mine and they picked it up from my friends house, can they do that?!

    At least the nightmare is over and I can get back to work, and even though my ordeal was relatively short (14 weeks) I can say it was a living hell and throughout the whole thing felt as if I was guilty until proven Innocent, whilst she gets away with it. I feel for anyone who has or is going through what I've just been through.

    Thank you for Reading
    Dave

  • #2
    Hi Dave,

    I am so pleased to read the worst of it is over, if you can prove the contract phone is yours they must return it.
    Make sure you go back into the police station and request to see the officer dealing with your case.

    You should also at this point check to see if this will show up on a eCRB.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Indigo View Post
      Hi Dave,

      I am so pleased to read the worst of it is over, if you can prove the contract phone is yours they must return it.
      Make sure you go back into the police station and request to see the officer dealing with your case.

      You should also at this point check to see if this will show up on a eCRB.
      Hi Indigo thank you for your response, according to my solicitors the enhanced CRB will only show assisted police with investigation if anything at all, I will get a paper copy of my phone contract to show to the case officer, although when I spoke to her she said it was a civil matter?

      Comment


      • #4
        Regarding the phone, if it was seized from her she will have the official receipt from the OIC and therefore it will be returned to her.

        I can completely understand why you won't want her to get any further benefit from the phone.....

        Presumably you put the phone in her name but arranged a direct debit on your card? If so can you not just cancel the contract & pay any cancellation fees (or does she then get to keep the phone.....?). If you know the IMEI(?) code can you report it as stolen?

        Congratulations on getting the NFA so quickly
        'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

        Comment


        • #5
          Thank you for your reply casehardened

          The phone was seized from my friends house as he collected it when we broke up, and the phone is in my name also so I don't see why there is an issue with it being returned to me.

          Thanks for the congratulations I'm just glad it didn't take any longer as was at the end of my tether anyway, thank god work were so supportive and my friend who owns 2 pubs paid me to manage one whilst I was on bail I am very lucky to have had an excellent support structure.
          Last edited by wings; 19 July 2014, 06:45 PM.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by wings View Post
            The phone was seized from my friends house as he collected it when we broke up, and the phone is in my name also so I don't see why there is an issue with it being returned to me.
            Casting my mind back to when my stuff was seized, I am certain that I had to countersign the official receipts along with the OIC & similarly sign to confirm when it was returned.

            In view of what you've posted did your friend countersign for the phone? If so he should get it back & could then pass it on to you.

            I imagine the OIC will want to return the phone to whoever s/he collected it from to avoid accusations of having mislaid it!
            'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Casehardened View Post
              Casting my mind back to when my stuff was seized, I am certain that I had to countersign the official receipts along with the OIC & similarly sign to confirm when it was returned.

              In view of what you've posted did your friend countersign for the phone? If so he should get it back & could then pass it on to you.

              I imagine the OIC will want to return the phone to whoever s/he collected it from to avoid accusations of having mislaid it!
              I volunteered my phone and didn't sign anything, I shall ask my friend if he had to sign anything but pretty sure he didn't, it was taken whilst I was away.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by wings View Post
                I volunteered my phone and didn't sign anything, I shall ask my friend if he had to sign anything but pretty sure he didn't, it was taken whilst I was away.
                I didn't volunteer mine; it was amongst property seized during a search so receipts were necessary for the audit trail.
                'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

                Comment


                • #9
                  I'm pleased it ended well and relatively quickly, although it must have seemed like an age.
                  Hopefully you are returning to some normality. Given her vindictive nature I would make sure she can't use that phone one way or the other somehow.
                  Wishing you a happy future.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Wings, you said

                    The bail ended on yesterday and I was informed on Thursday that "due to the evidence you presented us we believe you are innocent and we are taking no further action"
                    If they said that then I believe your case was, or should have been "No-Crimed" - no crime has been committed.

                    I really do think you should seriously consider asking the CPS in your (or her area) if they will consider prosecuting her, given the police have said to you, "due to the evidence you presented us we believe you are innocent and we are taking no further action".


                    If you have merely been NFA'd then I suggest that you contact the Chief Constable in the relevant area, and ask that the matter is changed to "No-Crime". That may well have a big difference on what is entered onto your ECRB/DBS check.
                    People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                    PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Agree with Rights Fighter never believe what a solicitor tells you about the eCRB check its not up to them.
                      Mine told me nothing would be on there but it is, and it's the worst thing possible.

                      The Chief Constable will make the decision to enter details from the crime onto an eCRB.
                      Make sure you get this resolved asap, worst mistake I ever made was not checking properly.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Thanks to both Rights Fighter and Indigo

                        I have contacted the case officer and left a message with regards to what you have advised, it is extremely important that my eCRB is clear as I work with young people so I have taken what you've said seriously and will make sure it gets checked out.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Please do keep us updated. Your case could help others in the future
                          People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                          PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Hi all just a quick update

                            Have checked with case officer and she has confirmed in an email that nothing will be on my eCRB (now called DBS).
                            I asked my lawyers about getting the NFA changed to No Crime and they are looking into it.
                            As for the phone I'm just going to cancel the contract as it's far to much hassle.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Yeayyyyy! Great stuff!!

                              Let us know about the No-Crime. I know the police are loath to do that as it tends to suggest they should have have known pretty quickly......
                              People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                              PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

                              Comment

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