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  • Dad accused of historic sexual assualt

    Post moved to position #6 in thread
    Last edited by Casehardened; 21 June 2014, 08:17 PM.

  • #2
    Dad accused of historic sexual assualt

    My dad has been falsely accussed of the sexual assault of a girl 10 years ago. She's saying she was 7 or 8 when it happened. We all know it's not true for various reasons but how the hell can you defend yourself against an allegation so old? What she is saying is totally untrue but she's taken bits and pieces and added in this lie and we just don't know what's going to happen now. She's described rooms in our house but my sister used t bring her round because they were poor and get food from our kitchen and take it back over to her house and she'd watch them all fry it up. But she's saying it was my dad and he'd bribe her with crisps and sweets and sexually assaulted her whilst they were alone in the kitchen. This isn't true. I don't wanna go into everything there's a long history with the family scrounging off of us and various things. Also the time she is saying 10 years ago we had all stopped talking to the whole family and the kids stopped knocking asking for stuff.

    Dad has been interviewed on tape and now the police officer is speaking to me and my sisters to get our accounts of what we remember. He asked for a solicitor for the interview and when dad asked him what he thought of all this he said in front of the officer "it's a load of rubbish". Dad has 20% hearing and finds it very difficult to understand people. He said he wasn't given the girls statement to read and all he knows is he's accused of touching her breasts but he doesn't know if he's accused of doing it once or multiple times or what! He wasn't even given the name or number of the solicitor.

    We've all been worried sick over this. Dad drank himself stupid all night. I've not eaten, keep shaking and crying. We just don't know how we can prove this is all lies.

    They all still live over the road from us and are the type standing in the street like they own the place, the gossips of the place. I simply have to look out the window and they're out there smoking and laughing like nothing is going on. How can they do this to us?

    At the time they are saying it happened my boyfriend lived with us for years in the house as well and he's a detective in the police now. I've given them his name in the hopes he can tell them anything that may help.

    The officer dealing with all this seems nice to us. She said it's not her decision to make whether dad is guilty or not and she will get our stories and it goes o a decision maker to decide from there. Dad hasn't been charged or anything so far. But she said it could take up to a year!

    We just feel desperate and alone. Worried sick. Dad wants to move, he's afraid of what everyone thinks. We cannot even look out our window without seeing them.

    Somebody please help me. Sorry if it's all garbled but I'm just so upset and depressed.

    Just spoken to one of my sisters who just had a call from the officer about what she remembers. My sister said it was like they kept trying to trip her up and that the officer said nothing she said was relevant so they wouldn't be taking a statement from her. I'm shaking.
    Last edited by Chigirl; 21 June 2014, 01:43 PM.

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    • #3
      Hi Chigirl, sorry to hear the situation your Dad and family are facing. It must be terrible to live in such close proximity to the accuser and her family. In the early stages the shock is terrible, many find it does get slightly easier after about a month, but weathering a false allegation takes real powers of endurance

      It is no surprise that the police do not want a statement from your sister, they are often not interested unless it supports the liars story and yet they claim it is an investigation ! We are currently pursuing a complaint through the IPCC regarding the police ignoring / refusing to look at evidence that strongly suggested from the beginning that our accuser was lying.

      Has there been any kind of argument or discord that could explain the timing of this allegation ?
      It is very difficult to defend an allegation particularly when you are not able to see the girl's statement, this will not be made available unless your Dad is charged.

      When you are feeling a bit stronger it would be useful if you could write down anything you can remember about any contact you have had with this girl and her family over the years. We found it useful to look through old photo albums which reminded us of time that the allegations were made against us. Was your Dad working at the time she is alleging, what were his shift patterns ? Any detail of your daily routine back then maybe useful. You won't know what information is relevant until you are fully aware of the details of the allegations which won't happen unless your Dad is charged. It feels impossible to defend yourself in the beginning against false allegations as it is impossible to guess what lies have been told, but it does get easier when you know what you're fighting against.

      Don't trust the police they have no moral scruples or integrity in my experience, any information you have should only be shared with a solicitor in the event he is charged. Hopefully your Dad will not be charged and it won't come to that.
      The truth is like a lion. You don't have to defend it. Let it loose. It will defend itself.

      St Augustine

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      • #4
        Thank you. Yes we have been remembering things and writing them down. When she is alleging it happened we had stopped really talking to all of that family and dad had a girlfriend who lived miles away he stayed with most days of the week and was only home one or two days a week. Me and my two sisters lived here. I finished work at 12 and came straight home and was off weekends.

        My sisters and I started hanging out with the mother of this girl before she was even born. We are all much older. It was a cool place to go at the time and we met boys over there and that's how we all met our first boyfriends. She had kids and was always on the scrounge for food fags and money for electric. I remember always giving the youngest boy crisps and sweets. My sister who was closer with them spent a lot of time over there. Over the years we just got fed up with their scrounging plus we grew up and got jobs and new boyfriends and just drifted apart from going over there. She had a daughter during these years and when she was a toddler up to about 5 or 6 my sister did used to bring her over and get freezer food out and crisps and stuff. Her mum would ask her to go get it! Then my sister would go back and they'd fry it all up and eat it. Her mum has supposedly said my dad would ask her to send this girl over on her own! This is all lies.

        The police officer keeps asking about any fallings out with the family. We just sort of drifted apart as we got on with our lives and realised they were users. They also keep focusing on the fact this girl described coming in through our back garden which is right opposite their house into our kitchen. Yes she did but with my sister!

        It's like nothing we say is relevent to the police. Does it not matter that 10 years ago all contact with them had long stopped. Yes she used to come over for thing with her brother but years before she is saying. And her brother was with her most times but he is saying dad said he was a nasty boy and sent him away!

        This family have started on their new neighbours posting on facebook slagging them off, calling the RSPCA on them and stuff. They are also best friends with another neighbour who I had a falling out with recently. She came to my door threatening me. I did call the police but didn't make a statement because I didn't want any trouble so said I'd leave it.

        What can we do, it's her word against my dad's. How can you prove your innocence against something like this? I can't eat or sleep, dad is a state. I wanna go over there and have it out with them but I can't. I just want this over with.

        Comment


        • #5
          [Chigirls post]


          Just spoken to one of my sisters who just had a call from the officer about what she remembers. My sister said it was like they kept trying to trip her up and that the officer said nothing she said was relevant so they wouldn't be taking a statement from her. I'm shaking.

          my other sister just rang. The PC phoned her and it seems some of what my sister has to say may be relevant because she is giving a statement on Tuesday. The PC did say though to my sister "but you can't say you were at home 24/7 and your dad was never alone" But who the hell can ever prove something like that? Dad although divorced from my mother is her carer and mum is agoraphobic and has never left the house she could back him up but now she's lost her mind in recent years and you can't get any sense out of her. I've tried to but she just wanders off talking about some other random rubbish. We have proof mother never left the house/her condition is well documented but she cannot give a lucid account
          Last edited by Casehardened; 1 Minute Ago at 08:53 PM.
          'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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          • #6
            Hi Chigirl,

            I felt it might be confusing to have identical first posts in two separate sections of the forum so have deleted the one in the General Discussion section & tried to move your reply over to this thread.

            Unfortunately the system has added this to the beginning of the thread & moving it down has made it appear to be written by me. Many apologies for any confusion that I have caused!.
            'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Chigirl View Post
              He wasn't even given the name or number of the solicitor.
              Don't worry about this, this will have been the duty solicitor who was there to make sure your dad was questioned and treated fairly during his interview.

              There is no reason why the duty solicitor cannot continue to act for your dad but we always advise using a solicitor that specialises in defending false allegations if the matter goes any further.

              There is no need to instruct solicitors just yet unless your dad is charged but it might be useful to look at the list of firms recommended by members to see if any are local to you.

              http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...ist-solicitors
              'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

              Comment


              • #8
                Hi Chigirl - so sorry you find yourself in this position and well-done for supporting your dad.

                Was the arresting officer or the DI who interviewed him aware that your Dad is hard of hearing? According to the Police regulations a deaf or hard of hearing person is entitled to have an appropriate adult with him at the police station and a Lipspeaker or interpreter if he uses sign-language. Do you know if he did?
                He's entitled to have a copy of his police custody records which will give the name of the solicitor who assisted him during his interview.

                I know it's already been said, but it's really important that if your father gets charged he gets a specialised solicitor who is experienced in these matters.
                Also, if you and your sisters know or believe he didn't do this, you must become organised and methodical in the way you do things - for example when you write down your recollections, try to remember dates, places, if someone else was there.
                It sounds like you've got the neighbours from hell... don't let them provoke you, or act tit-for-tat, you can best help your dad defend this accusation by staying rational and calm.

                This is a public forum, anyone can read the posts, you don't need to write every detail down. Some FA's have been known to change their statements several times.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Hi chigirl - another complete nightmare a vicious FA is causing. I really hope the police see through this **** and don't charge your dad. My 14 year son was falsely accused and I was so outraged and upset when I first heard what was being said about him. But I didn't realise that no one believed this horrible girl, she was known as a trouble maker who fabricated stories for attention all her short sad life. I know this family is on the attack, but I doubt anyone will believe them. They will have their motives, they may even believe their own story, you probably will never understand because you haven't got a twisted mind.

                  The best you can hope for is the police or the cps to take a decision No Further Action. But it's unlikely that they will tell you they don't believe her, that would mean they aren't supporting the victim and she will never admit she is making it up as it leaves her exposed to prosecution. Come on here for support, it will shock you that so many people are subjected to FAs, but you will get some great support and empathy as most who post are in the same boat or have been!

                  Good luck and try and keep your head up x

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I've copied and pasted my reply to the other thread in this thread:




                    Hi and welcome to the forum,

                    Sorry that you've had to find us.

                    Is your father on bail?


                    It seems quite common in this day and age to bite the hand that feeds you. There have been a few similar stories to your own over the last while. There are no easy solutions unfortunately.

                    One little thing that stands out in your post. The Police do not decide 'guilt' they merely collect 'evidence'. There is a threshold of evidence which is required before determination of how to proceed. Do not expect the Police to do anything apart from gather the evidence and then determine how to proceed. If there is a decision to proceed it does not imply guilt it merely means that there is enough evidence and a decent chance of a successful prosecution, even then the evidence can be terrible and the chances of success slim in your opinion and yet your father ends up in court.

                    The Police/Crown Prosecution Service present their case to the court and your fathers defence team present their case. The jury then decide.

                    The 'key' in the process is the defence team. Does your father have a good solicitor who has experience with sexual offences. You need to ensure that he doesn't simply have a solicitor that practices criminal law, he/she needs to be an expert in the field of sexual offences.

                    As for the relative closeness of the accuser and her family. I would consider installing CCTV, not a super expensive system but a couple of covert cameras in areas such as the front/back doors potentially covering front/back gardens etc. Buy a home DIY setup rather than have a CCTV installation van parked outside the house and attracting unnecessary attention. Stick a little sticker on the door and start the cameras rolling. If anything the days it'll take to setup the system will pass time and distract attention giving a little relief.

                    As for the period between now and whatever the outcome may be... It is not uncommon to take longer than a year and in some cases considerably less, there doesn't seem to be any set criteria. I hope it's cleared up quickly for you guys.
                    Wow... A signature option!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      'As for the relative closeness of the accuser and her family. I would consider installing CCTV, not a super expensive system but a couple of covert cameras in areas such as the front/back doors potentially covering front/back gardens etc. Buy a home DIY setup rather than have a CCTV installation van parked outside the house and attracting unnecessary attention. Stick a little sticker on the door and start the cameras rolling. If anything the days it'll take to setup the system will pass time and distract attention giving a little relief.'

                      Brilliant suggestion! You'd be amazed at what some people will get up to.

                      I also hope it's sorted as quickly and painlessly as possible. Seems like you've already got quite a lot on your plates as a family.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Thank you all so so much. The DC didn''t interview dad until the next day after she had taken advice about his hearing. He doesn't sign so that option was out but she said she wanted to make 100% sure he could understand everything. He is due to have a Coclear implant in September and she was even willing to wait until then so he could hear better. In fact she had been trying to get hold of dad for 2 weeks and couldn't get him on the phone and said she didn't want to have to come to our door.

                        Dad was not arrested and is not on bail. He was told he was free to walk out the station at any time.

                        I have considered CCTV round the back, I don't trust them.

                        At them moment the DC seems to be gathering our side after getting theirs. I was upset on the phone and she asked me if I was ok and said to not worry "there is no evidence" (on the accusers part). Even the solicitor said "it's a load of rubbish"

                        Also is it usual for the DC to say if we have any trouble from them to dial 999. I suppose she's said the same to them?

                        Should we be looking at getting a solicitor that specialises in this yet or wait to see if he's charged?

                        We are swinging from feeling ok and that it will be alright in the end to worrying ourselves sick again. We all know it's lies, we just want this over with. After living here all our lives and with my mother ill we are gonna have to move. We can't look out the window without seeing them. The girl visits her mum daily with her gaggle of kids and stands in the street laughing like nothing happened.
                        Last edited by Chigirl; 22 June 2014, 10:59 AM.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Chigirl View Post
                          Thank you all so so much. The DC didn''t interview dad until the next day after she had taken advice about his hearing. He doesn't sign so that option was out but she said she wanted to make 100% sure he could understand everything. He is due to have a Coclear implant in September and she was even willing to wait until then so he could hear better. In fact she had been trying to get hold of dad for 2 weeks and couldn't get him on the phone and said she didn't want to have to come to our door.

                          Dad was not arrested and is not on bail. He was told he was free to walk out the station at any time.

                          I have considered CCTV round the back, I don't trust them.

                          At them moment the DC seems to be gathering our side after getting theirs. I was upset on the phone and she asked me if I was ok and said to not worry "there is no evidence" (on the accusers part). Even the solicitor said "it's a load of rubbish"

                          Also is it usual for the DC to say if we have any trouble from them to dial 999. I suppose she's said the same to them?

                          Should we be looking at getting a solicitor that specialises in this yet or wait to see if he's charged?

                          We are swinging from feeling ok and that it will be alright in the end to worrying ourselves sick again. We all know it's lies, we just want this over with. After living here all our lives and with my mother ill we are gonna have to move. We can't look out the window without seeing them. The girl visits her mum daily with her gaggle of kids and stands in the street laughing like nothing happened.
                          The DC normally pays very little interest in the accused and their family other than to extract the information that they require. As far as 999 is concerned I would imagine the closeness of the accuser and her family would be the reason for that although what use calling would be is open to question.

                          As for a specialist solicitor. Potentially not worth bothering at the moment. If circumstances change regarding bail or charge then I would maybe recommend it then. Nothing stopping you having a look and seeing what solicitors are available though.

                          I know EXACTLY what you mean with regarding 'living here all our lives'. My childhood home was destroyed (not literally) by my false accuser, my parents have remained but I very rarely go and visit.
                          Wow... A signature option!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Great idea from Lawless1 to get CCTV installed.

                            If you need to contact the duty sol, the OIC will have the contact details. In fact I would go so far as to contact the sol via the police and ask for a copy of the hand written notes he/she made - if they did of course.

                            Keep posting and you'll soon be able to send private messages. Feel free to send me one and maybe we can chat about this on the phone some time. I've worked in the field of false allegations since late 2002 and have assisted many people at trial and appeal.

                            Take care.
                            People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                            PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                            • #15
                              Thank you so much. We contacted the Duty Solicitor and they sent a letter outlining everything. Statements have been given on both sides. I guess now it's a waiting game? Still in bits over this but we just have to carry on.

                              I wanted to PM some people but I can't yet, hopefully I'll be able to soon.

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