Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Confused after report of rape

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Confused after report of rape

    Hello everybody,

    Just got here after I googled "false accusations of rape". I was just curious why online there are so many threads or websites about people falsely accused of rape.

    I live in Scotland and I went through the painful process of reporting my ex boyfriend to the police for rape and domestic abuse. In only two weeks, police didn't even care to investigate much, questioned my ex and then they turned on me, going straight for the false accusation crime against me.
    In conclusion, my ex was let free of getting away with all the harm he had done to me and I'm still waiting to know what will happen to me after 3 months!!
    The fact that there's no corroborative evidence implies that all raped women are lying?
    If I want to be honest, police even cut me off from providing evidence that my ex was a schizophrenic, a pervert and a violent person, focusing more on blaming me than him!!
    And they clutched at straws to put the blame on me, given that I never drank or did drugs, and I was never promiscous.
    I was detained for two hours at a police station, without a lawyer.

    I mean, is this kind of behaviour common?

    Apart from the fact that I got physical injuries after being raped 4 times (after being continuously abused for one year), what angers me the most is that historical rape is considered a lie only because the victim didn't report it when it happened.

    It would be easier to say "If this didn't happen recently, don't report it or it could backfire on you".

    Wonder why rape associations try to convince us to report. The process of reporting someone to police is awful and it's even more hurtful not being believed, it's unbelievable that people think loads of women can make things up for fun.

  • #2
    Originally posted by MerlinScot View Post
    Just got here after I googled "false accusations of rape". I was just curious why online there are so many threads or websites about people falsely accused of rape.
    Bearing in mind your particular circumstances, I'm curious as to why you would have googled this particular phrase
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

    Comment


    • #3
      I'm so sorry that this has happened to you and the person who committed them has walked away.

      We do our best to only help those that are falsely accused - if what it written doesn't add up or as time goes on we realise that all is not what it should be (between us we can normally spot the liar) then we no longer help them and bar them.

      What you have described is exactly the reverse of what the chaps on here are going through - both in their own way are horrific and never gotten over.

      Please keep posting and we'll do our best to help you too. The only thing I can suggest is to keep hassling the police.
      And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

      Comment


      • #4
        Because it seems quite a big topic of discussion to defend "suspected rapists" but it's never taken into consideration the rape victims.

        It seems the problem of rape victims/false accusations starts in the society, more worried about the consequences of accusing someone innocent than the fact rape scars a woman for life. I'm not going to forget it, ever. No matter if my life will be better or worse in one year or more.

        I was also interested to understand why I had been accused to waste the police time and that's why I googled that phrase. Although police never used that words, but "wasting their time and energy" is the equivalent to say I lied.

        Statistics are not of any help in this case. Rape Crisis Scotland defines the percentage of false rape allegations around 2%.
        It seems like police statistics are higher, around 6%, but I wonder why now.
        Many rape victims are pressured into recanting their statements. I've firsthand knowledge of this, given that I had been shoveled in a cell and asked to undress, so that I was phisically put under pressure (same treatment used by inteligence guys to make spies and criminals confess), feeling cold and uneasy. I'd bet many victims recant their statements after the detention, even if it's only for few hours.

        Anyway, up here it seems that this behavious is common practice, unfortunately: http://brennybaby.blogspot.co.uk/201...condemned.html

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by RFLH View Post
          We do our best to only help those that are falsely accused.

          Please keep posting and we'll do our best to help you too. The only thing I can suggest is to keep hassling the police.
          Thanks a lot!! I feel like I've been falsely accused of lying. I'm trying to be strong but after being raped having to deal with the police became an unbearable weight.

          At the moment, everything is stuck into the Crown Office, so I'm hassling a bit the Procurator Fiscal, it seems fair to me that they should decide what they want to do with my case. It's really discouraging to see that my ex was let free after few days and I'm still waiting to know if I'll be prosecuted or not.

          Comment


          • #6
            I still can't understand the way the police work - seems they go for the easy option and lesser paperwork.

            Have you been offered any counselling?
            And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

            Comment


            • #7
              You mean, by the police? No.
              After my first call to Rape Crisis Scotland 2 months ago, it seems I was entitled to get a SOLO officer but I was never given any info about it by the DC, it's ike they ran over me with a tractor.
              Living in a remote location meant that I started having support by email or phone from local charities but I'm still waiting, after 3 months, for an available slot to a face to face support. It's not their fault though, the fact is that there's no rape counselling services in the Highlands except one charity, they're overloaded with calls and abused people asking for help.
              Rape Crisis Scotland nearest office is in Aberdeen, about 200 miles from where I live.
              I don't understand the justice system at all, so I won't go there. Yet, police asked to provide certain evidence about the rape and the dates the rape had happened (we were not living together). When I saw the folder of my ex's evidence I was shocked. They had allowed him to provide evidence about the whole relationship, meaning all my emails/texts/Facebook messages from the start, like they wanted to figure out my reasoning or my personality. That shocked me. Police didn't allow me to use any kind of correspondence as an evidence of his mental condition and behaviour. This left out about 70 mails sent by my ex, plus hundreds of texts (I've a Nokia smart phone, so everything was saved on my laptop hard disk by default), MSN chats, skype chats, facebook messages and even more.

              I undoubtedly felt fooled. Yeah they go for lesser paperwork but in this case they showed some sexism too. Given that the case didn't go to court, previous allegations and ex girlfriends were not admitted as witnesses.
              Last edited by MerlinScot; 26 April 2012, 09:14 AM.

              Comment


              • #8
                You've been shockingly let down by everyone it seems.

                I don't know much about the Scottish Legal System (obviously some things will be the same) but I don't understand why you weren't allowed to use all you had against him. I guess you could complain about your treatment at higher levels than those at the Police Station you had your interview at.
                And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

                Comment


                • #9
                  Unfortunately the way rape cases are dealt with is a complete lottery.
                  If you were in a big town or a city I would bet my mortgage that you would have been dealt with kindly. However, you live in a rural location, and sometimes Plod is little more than a village Bobby who doesn't want to disturb his local community.
                  I'm sorry you had such a horrendous experience. We will offer support in any way we can.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Lottery is the correct word, Saffron.
                    There are some genuine cases that are dealt with appallingly. Conviction rates are still low for the crime of rape and I have no doubt that there are many rapists and abusers getting away with disgusting crimes.

                    Similarly, there are also liars who undermine real victims by raising false allegations and I commend you, as a rape victim, for keeping an open mind about this, particularly after being let down by a rotten system.

                    The difficulty with rape cases is that very often it boils down to one word versus the other and that's where the lottery comes into play. Which side will they fall on? Who is the most reliable? Who will look and present themselves well in court?

                    Many falsely accused make the incorrect assumption that the law always favours the accuser of rape...whether genuine or not. Many rape victims wrongly believe it the other way. in truth, it is an extremely flawed system that serves nobody and, as a result, innocent people are locked up and guilty are left to roam.

                    I am disgusted that you have been offered no counselling. I would strongly recommend that you see your GP.

                    Please don't see this website as a place where we are not on the side of rape victims. We aim to support genuine victims of both sides. Those falsely accused are victims too, after all.

                    Take care.
                    "Be sure your sin will find you out"

                    Numbers 32:23

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by RFLH View Post
                      You've been shockingly let down by everyone it seems.

                      I don't know much about the Scottish Legal System (obviously some things will be the same) but I don't understand why you weren't allowed to use all you had against him. I guess you could complain about your treatment at higher levels than those at the Police Station you had your interview at.
                      Actrually, I'm thinking of really doing it RFLH, although... I've to admit I've no idea where to start

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Faith View Post
                        Lottery is the correct word, Saffron.
                        There are some genuine cases that are dealt with appallingly. Conviction rates are still low for the crime of rape and I have no doubt that there are many rapists and abusers getting away with disgusting crimes.

                        Similarly, there are also liars who undermine real victims by raising false allegations and I commend you, as a rape victim, for keeping an open mind about this, particularly after being let down by a rotten system.

                        The difficulty with rape cases is that very often it boils down to one word versus the other and that's where the lottery comes into play. Which side will they fall on? Who is the most reliable? Who will look and present themselves well in court?

                        Many falsely accused make the incorrect assumption that the law always favours the accuser of rape...whether genuine or not. Many rape victims wrongly believe it the other way. in truth, it is an extremely flawed system that serves nobody and, as a result, innocent people are locked up and guilty are left to roam.

                        I am disgusted that you have been offered no counselling. I would strongly recommend that you see your GP.

                        Please don't see this website as a place where we are not on the side of rape victims. We aim to support genuine victims of both sides. Those falsely accused are victims too, after all.

                        Take care.
                        I actually hate the liars, because that's their fault if rape victims like me get a suspicious and judgemental treatment by the police and the justice system from the start. What I can't stand is seeing the comments of some men (or women) who say that they have "friends of friends of friends who were falsely accused of rape". No wait, false allegations of rape aren't so common as people believe and very often the certainty of lying is when the raped women/men recant.

                        As I've firsthand knowledge of the treatment a rape victim receives even before the case goes to court (treatment is more than horrendous), I doubt that any woman lies unless she's very very stupid or totally unaware of the law and how the legal system works.

                        At least following the Scottish law, out of nearly 1600 rape reports only 52 were convicted as rapists and more of 85% were serial rapists. I read a comment of an idiot online stating that one of his friends had been accused of rape and he was jailed for 7 years. If there's no 100% proof of evidence the guy raped the woman, the case doesn't even go to further proceedings.
                        Don't know how it works in UK, but in Scotland because of the ancient law of the corroborative evidence, very rarely rape cases end in the conviction of the rapists. And more important, false rape allegations is a crime punished with more jail years than the rape.

                        Of course, I've an open mind so it's also horrendous to see innocent men jailed for a lie. But in Scotland, if you take into account the false rape allegations, plus the cases endeing in conviction... 90% of the reports don't make it to court. Which means that probably 90% of the rapists are out

                        RFHL: I wasn't allowed to show evidence out of the dates I was raped. I went berserk when I saw that my ex had given them whatever

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Oh heck, you've raised a few things there that I would disagree with but I don't think it would be appropriate of me to do so.

                          I will say though, that you have been treated horrendously by the authorities. It is by no means the norm however. You have every right to assume that the police etc are on the side of the accused and treat the accuser badly, but often it is very much unbalanced the other way.

                          People do lie unfortunately and whilst I won't argue your statistics as I don't quite know where you've got them from, it is still the case that rape is the only crime where evidence is not needed to convict. I happen to agree that that SHOULD remain the case...after all...how can one prove that they have been raped? What I would like to see changed is the compensation opportunities (no compensation should be made available until after trial in my view)

                          Liars don't have to be stupid to raise an allegation like this. In fact, often they can be very clever and know exactly what they're doing.

                          The law, as it stands, serves neither side...either the genuine victims or the falsely accused. Both are victims.

                          You must be very disheartened and have no faith in the system that has treated you this way. It is much the same for the men who have found their lives tarnished with the lies.

                          I do agree with you that in comparison to genuine rapes, false allegations are in the minority. However, they are more common than people might think...

                          I hope you are doing well.
                          "Be sure your sin will find you out"

                          Numbers 32:23

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Faith View Post
                            I will say though, that you have been treated horrendously by the authorities. It is by no means the norm however. You have every right to assume that the police etc are on the side of the accused and treat the accuser badly, but often it is very much unbalanced the other way.
                            Following what Scottish law say, nobody can be accused of a crime until there's the 100% evidence the accused did it, which in a rape case it's impossible, as you stated later in your post.
                            That's why it angers me that people think falsely accusing someone of rape is so easy, very often it's the other way around.

                            Originally posted by Faith View Post
                            People do lie unfortunately and whilst I won't argue your statistics as I don't quite know where you've got them from, it is still the case that rape is the only crime where evidence is not needed to convict. I happen to agree that that SHOULD remain the case...after all...how can one prove that they have been raped? What I would like to see changed is the compensation opportunities (no compensation should be made available until after trial in my view).
                            Here we're talking about 2 different justice systems, so I won't argue about what you're saying about English statistics and laws. I make you notice that in Scotland evidence is needed, which is why we've the worst rape laws in the world

                            Originally posted by Faith View Post
                            Liars don't have to be stupid to raise an allegation like this. In fact, often they can be very clever and know exactly what they're doing. The law, as it stands, serves neither side...either the genuine victims or the falsely accused. Both are victims.
                            It's horrible to know that in England liars get away with lies. I can understand your point of view. As a matter of fact, for the law despite I'm a genuine rape victim I'm a liar too so I can deeply understand what men or women falsely accused feel.

                            Originally posted by Faith View Post
                            You must be very disheartened and have no faith in the system that has treated you this way. It is much the same for the men who have found their lives tarnished with the lies.
                            I am. Especially because I was pushed by few rape and abuse organizations to report my case, given that my abuser and rapist was someone who was working and volunteering as a support worker, ironically in abuse and rape matters. He was highly skilled in that meaning, and he had lied about his past and his mental condition to his employers (which is, by itself, something you can be prosecuted for. Police liked to overlook that too ) in order to achieve better skills in getting his victims. I'm the 3rd girlfriend who goes through his abuse, but previous allegations and witnesses aren't admitted until the case goes to court.


                            Originally posted by Faith View Post
                            I do agree with you that in comparison to genuine rapes, false allegations are in the minority. However, they are more common than people might think...

                            I hope you are doing well.
                            I don't know if false allegations are more common than believed, our system makes impossible to determine the real percentage of genuine rapes and false accusations. Although I can understand that many men are falsely accused of rape but... what do you think my ex's family and friends think and say around? That he's a rapist?

                            Thanks for the flowers
                            Being a bit anxious these days

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              you have been treated appallingly and I do hope that the other ladies come forward to back you up - it seems odd that the police know of the others and still seem to be shielding him.

                              Would you feel up to seeing your MP about your trestment? Quite often things start to happen when they start to look into things.
                              Last edited by RFLH; 29 April 2012, 09:33 AM. Reason: added a bit more!
                              And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X