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Tinder: The Unexpected Dangers of Swiping Right

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  • Tinder: The Unexpected Dangers of Swiping Right

    PART 1:

    As a predominantly gay and single twenty-two year old in London I use Tinder in order to meet potential dates, and yes, on occasion to find casual sex - a way to feel a bit less lonely in a city where a casual encounters are more common that eating fast food. I didn’t realise how a date could come with so many disastrous consequences.

    I met my accuser on Tinder where we matched and messaged before he asked to come over to my flat and we set a date. However once the day of the date arrived I was feeling worse-for-wear since the night before I had a dinner party which had left me hungover.

    Feeling as if it was too late to cancel, I went to meet my date at the tube station because he texted me saying he felt too scared to walk the two streets to my flat in Notting Hill, hardly a notoriously dangerous area. I imagined he wanted to ‘size me up’ before he made the commitment to come inside.

    Once we were back at mine I offered him some wine and crisps left over from my party the night before. I noticed that rather than sipping his wine like I did, he waited 10 minute intervals and then guzzled the whole glass down in one. He repeated this process. I did find this odd, but passed it off as a quirk but did quickly realise he might be at best a one-night stand and was not going to become anything more. Between the two of us we probably drank about a bottle and a half of wine, most of which he poured for us both himself before stating that he hadn’t drank since New Years, two months previous.

    We moved over from the dining table to the sofa where we kissed whilst listening to some pop music which we mutually enjoyed. He said it was fine to kiss him but I shouldn’t touch his face with my hand since he was wearing makeup to contour his face and didn’t want to smudge his makeup.

    Eventually I led him casually by the hand to my room. We began consensual foreplay and ended up having consensual penetrative sex.

    Once we had finished he told me he loved me.

    I didn’t know what to respond and he backtracked by saying that “he loved me in the way he loves his cat”. I think not returning the affection made him volatile. I thought he knew it was just a casual affair, this should have been obvious at this point seeing as it was the first time we had met.

    I broke the silence by offering him a cigarette, and we smoked in bed before foreplay began again. I noticed after a while he picked up his phone and started texting his friend. I kissed him on the chest until reaching a level head with him and stared at the screen where I read “HELP - come and pick me up”, something to that effect. He asked me to stop. I immediately stopped all physical contact with him.

    He ran to the bathroom and I heard him throw up and start to cry. He came back out and lied back down in the bed, now the lights were back on and he said in a repetitive manner “I said no, I said no, I said no...”

    I was freaked out by the statement which was false, since when we were fooling around again and he asked me to stop I did. I tried to comfort his agitation by offering him a glass of water and a pair of pyjamas. He said a friend was going to pick him up.

    He also told me he was scared, I told him not to be and he later said to the police I told him he should be scared.

    He left the flat and got into a car. You would imagine someone who would later claim to have been spiked would find it difficult to walk out of the flat, or be able to get out of bed when they wished to go to the bathroom.

    With a feeling of unease, I imagined the police turning up at my doorstep but put the experience behind me and fell asleep feeling that either he was unstable and vindictive in which case I couldn’t do anything. Perhaps I was exaggerating the situation and he was harmless.

    I soon awoke to hear police officers outside the bedroom window muffling words into their radios.

    The front door pounded with an intensity that could only mean one thing. The police were there. I was right, he was falsely alleging that I had raped him.

    Perhaps he claimed what he did because he told me that he loved me after we had sex and I didn’t say it back? Maybe it’s because he had a boyfriend and didn’t want to admit he had cheated, in which case why was he on Tinder, a dating app? Maybe he was a virgin and regretted losing his virginity to a one night stand?

    Sometimes I wonder whether he became so drunk, since he was unused to drinking, that he truly believed his drink had been spiked. I doubt it though. After my arrest, he continued to ‘like’ social media of mine. His behaviour was bizarre, matching his earlier duplicity: he convinced me over Tinder that he was a full-time professional, not a 17-year-old sixth form student.

    The police refuse to see the evidence I have that confirms this. How can we continue to live in a society that claims to “…prevent crime and support victims", a sentence which the Metropolitan police use to sign off their emails, when in this case my alleger was never brought to justice.

    On our ‘date’, he spoke at length about a prominent figure in the fashion industry who is currently serving time for sexual assault, but has an injunction out to prevent it being spoken about in the press. It feels like he already had rape on the mind.

    He also spoke about having two characters one for when he was in public and another private persona, and stated that in public he would probably ignore me even though it seemed we shared mutual acquaintances. I wish I had listened to my gut instincts that something felt off, made my excuses and asked him to leave.

    I was also told that my alleger posted a status recently on his Facebook account accusing another person of being ‘#ABitRapey’. This seems a bit crass for someone who believed they had been raped to post, barely a month after the event. When I told the police about this after the case was dropped, they said it would be up to him to enter another accusation. Despite reinforcing that that was not what I meant, I was met with total disinterest.

    Indeed, through the process I repeatedly felt that my valid questions were being met with totally robotic responses by the police, in a similar fashion to talking to your phone company about cancelling your contract. The synths on the recently aired ‘Humans’ series on Channel 4 were more feeling.

    After being arrested at around 2am, humiliated in front of my neighbours and dressed in the equivalent of a hazmat suit/head-to-toe protective suit to preserve evidence, I was hauled into the back of a police van with handcuffs on.

    I cried silently during the ride to the station. It felt so unreal: false allegations were something that happened to other people far detached from me. I couldn’t fathom what this man would stand to gain by lying. I felt detached from my body, I had surrendered to my helplessness and anxiety.

    I’m not surprised that the accused admit to things they don’t truly believe under police interrogation – extreme anxiety can make it hard to reason rationally.

    For this reason, it is vital to have a solicitor with you who will brief you on what to say - usually no comment. Every fibre of your body is telling you to give your side of the story under the illusion that the detectives will just go "oh that makes sense" and let you go on your way. Cuts to legal aid have made it more difficult to get a decent lawyer without having to pay extortionate fees and frantically try to find one before the interrogation.

    A good solicitor will explain that it is the police's job to find evidence, not yours to provide them with and make it easier to join the dots in a way that you might not have perceived to be your own truth. Of course looking through the events that had happened I knew I was innocent, the fact that perhaps in the mind of my alleger he might truly believe I was to blame made me feel guilty and misunderstood.

    In my case it later became apparent during a draining interrogation after a sleepless night in a cold cell, that he believed I had put something in his drink while on our first and only date at my flat, a location of his choosing, not surprising when it later emerged that he had lied about his age and wouldn’t be able to go to a bar, which would have been eventually been proved to be false by the police or they would not have dropped the case without asking for a recommendation from the CPS.

    I was told it would benefit me to offer to be intimately examined by a physician; a process which includes taking samples of your pubic hair and swabs from your genitals. I am sure the process is similar for the alleger as well but I felt it was extremely invasive.

    In my case the physician seemed to linger too long. The police officer in the room faced the wall. I didn’t feel like I could speak out about this at the time. The police should not have recommended that the examination would be in my interest for me before a solicitor could give me his opinion a further 8 or so hours later. My experience of the examination is backed up by a report by Baroness Stern “(physicians) demonstrate quite inappropriate behaviour at times, with poor clinical practice.”

    Despite the lack of any evidence, bail was extended 3 times. Each extension meant the roller coaster of emotions continued, eventually making me numb and snappy. I was left feeling almost suicidal. Neither the police nor my solicitor was able to give me a clear timeframe or a probable outcome.

    There were no official support groups to go to, whereas apparent victims of rape are guided to officially sanctioned organisations they can reach out to. I was facing a sentence up to life imprisonment, the usual sentence ranging from 5 to 7 years in a prison for sex offenders. Even in the rare case a prosecution is brought forward for a false allegation they are likely to get at worst a two year sentence if proved guilty.

    I didn’t feel safe going back to my apartment. Not only because of the trauma, but out of fear that his lies would have got to his family and under the knowledge a protective and trusting family can be threatening. I tried to resume my normal life but was unable to work under the depression and anxiety that accumulated during the ordeal. As a result, I had to give up my flat and move back in with family who just simply didn't have the space. I spent my already sleepless nights bedding down on the living-room floor, staying up until all hours watching self-help videos and reading forums with the stories of men who had gone through varying levels of a similar experience.

    I can now look back and feel grateful for the fact that it is over without having been wrongly imprisoned for an extended period of time, something many others have sadly had to go through.

    During and after my ordeal, I struggled to make sense of events. I wanted to move on, but felt disillusioned knowing that everything I held dear could be threatened by events outside of my control. I didn’t know how I could move on without creating some meaning or purpose from the seven months of my life I spent on standstill. My experience on the forums of men in similar situations led me to read more widely around the subject. My findings shocked me.

    Bail is where a suspect is released after custody with the condition of having to return upon a specific date. It used to be used for periods of up to 48 hours but it is now something that people can be on for years without a clear view of when the situation will be resolved.

    Freddie Starr of Paffa, People Against False Allegations of Abuse, states that around 57,000 people are left “waiting in limbo” on police bail. Many, who were never arrested and not bailed, are STILL waiting to hear whether there is an NFA, no further action, or verdict of No-Crime. “When [the accused] is innocent this [can be] sheer torture for them and their loved ones… ”. He started a petition declaring “there is no legislation stating how long the police can keep somebody on police bail pre-charge, this meaning that they are under no obligation to carry out an investigation with speed. I would like a time scale set on how long the police are able to keep somebody on police bail”.

  • #2
    Part 2

    MPs are said to be backing a recommendation to implement a 28-day police bail limit in a report published in March. Furthermore, the recommendation argues that people suspected of sexual offences should retain the right to anonymity, unless charged. Unfortunately, it appears the Association of Chief Police Officers would like to oppose the report's findings retweeting a statement by Rapecrisis.org.uk which has since been removed.

    Often bail has conditions attached - in my case, not to talk to the victim. Indeed, the alleger is labelled a "victim" from the start, even before any charges have been brought. This emphasizes the bias the police have towards the easier choice of victim in the murky waters of a situation such as this.

    The assumption should go that since someone cannot be found innocent until a court of law had found them so by that same token a victim can only be identified by a court of law. Therefore the police are pre-judging the role of a court. Perhaps this is due to the pressure of rape support groups and knee jerk reactions by the government. This is damaging the genuine victim in cases of false allegations merely by the terminology used.


    I still feel outraged by the fact that there is a two-tier legal system where unless you are moneyed or in the public eye you can't fight back with a private prosecution or an injunction. Police rarely prosecute individuals who falsely cry rape under laws for perverting the course of justice, in order to prevent the victims of true rape, or those with psychological problems, from facing jail time and fines. I believe my accuser may have suffered from Munchausen syndrome by proxy, the abuse of another person in order to so the abuser can get attention.

    Police do not provide the falsely accused with evidence gathered during their investigation if the case does not proceed to trial, so the accused has little to go on in most cases to fight a false accusation.

    I wouldn’t have wanted to go to trial, but I would have liked a way to prove my innocence: even arrests without charge, and not-guilty verdicts, can show up on an extended DBS check – needed to work or volunteer if sensitive groups are concerned – if the police deem it relevant to a job application.

    Further, those with arrests on their record aren’t entitled to visa waivers for the USA, even when the allegations are false: obtaining a visa instead necessitates a visit to the American embassy, in which one proves that that the case was dropped.

    Legal aid should be available in these types of cases, in order for the accused to be able to pursue a libel claim against the alleger. Statutory compensation should similarly be awarded.

    UK police departments have classified around 8% of rape allegations as false reports, but this does not include those cases that are simply dropped such as mine: this makes the government statistics easier to swallow, and prevents a full review of procedures. 41% of reports are false according to a peer-reviewed study by Eugene Kanin. Perhaps the rates of false allegations are not as high as this, but it is a worrying thought if they are somewhere between 8% and 41% considering the resources this detracts from legitimate cases.

    A high proportion of false allegations is not surprising when you factor in 1-5% of the population as having borderline personality disorder.

    The very nature of sex usually being in a private setting means we probably won't be able to get an accurate statistic.

    Think about your own friends who have gone through the awful ordeal of being raped, how many of them have gone to police? I have several friends who have suffered sexual abuse in silence, none have reported it to the police even after years of therapy and encouragement in many cases because they understand how high the burden of evidence is.

    My alleger also spread his lies among the gay community, making it near impossible for me to meet new partners. Having to explain that he lied, and get people to believe that that is true without having to sit them down and give them a long essay is possibly the least sexy thing to do on the planet.

    The fact he is now working as a flyer boy for one of London’s most prominent gay clubs make it’s difficult even to walk down the street in Soho.

    Under 18s, like my alleger, make up a substantial part of the online dating community, in many cases lacking the emotional maturity to be in such an hyper-sexualised world. Almost half of accusers are under the age of 21.

    Online dating platforms such as Tinder should take responsibility in leading the way to a safer dating environment by verifying people's identities in a similar way pto how AirBnB already does this with their hosts, by asking them to upload a form of ID.

    Rape is a brutal, horrific act. Individuals who cry rape retrospectively out of regret, or in order to hurt someone, trivialise this and make it harder for genuine victims to have their voices heard. The system is all too easy to navigate for would-be accusers since the increased priority in sexual assault that followed from scandals such as Jimmy Saville.

    Police must be accountable to make sure that those rapes that are reported are true, leaving the least possible trauma for both those raped and those falsely accused of rape.

    My iPhone I use for work was taken away as evidence and not returned until after the case was closed. To start, we need increased funding in order to decrease the backlog of work for the Crown Prosecution Service: one of the main reasons given for extending bail is an inability to process mobiles and computers in a timely manner. This would allow both parties to resume their lives as soon as possible, since it is also dangerous and unfair to leave a guilty man on the streets for an extended period of time while the police are conducting their lengthy investigations.

    Those who are suspected of falsely alleging rape should be forced to attend a psychiatrist to ensure they do not repeat their actions and incur a hefty fine, it is not reason enough to let them off to prevent the dissuasion of real victims coming forward for this reasons I insist that the police should have agreed to review both their evidence and evidence I had gathered to see whether it would be beneficial to prosecute the alleger for perverting the course of justice.

    The law should not work for one party but not another.

    I have been told by the police since the matter concluded that it is not my business whether they gave him any sort of lecture about what a strong allegation rape is. In Britain, as a crime, it is considered second only to murder and as a society we must clear the names of those that are innocent, in order to prevent the stigma from tainting their name unjustly for the remainder of their lives. This has become increasingly important now that we live in an information age where unfair headline grabbing articles written by newspapers remain online for all to see.

    Whilst the technology that brought in online dating might come with its own set of problems, it does innovate just as fast. The future seems to be heading in the direction of apps such as ‘Good2Go’ and ‘We Consent’, which claim to record the consent of participants. Whether this would hold up in court would be another matter when you factor in the possibility of individuals acting under duress, but hopefully it would make those cases where the line is so very fine think twice about whether it is rape or simply regret, and certainly would avoid cases of trying to achieve their own personal advantage in the way of victim compensation.

    Margaret Gardener, the Director of FASO, stated in a letter to Baroness Stern “False allegations are fed by the knowledge of compensation from the Criminal Injuries Compensation Authority (CICA) this body often pays out compensation prior to trials, never checks if the trials happen and never claim compensation back, even if in court, the accuser is found to be lying and making a false allegation. In other countries this practice has ceased and the rape figures have dropped dramatically – giving those who have been raped a clear field in which to have proper and considerate investigations made and the true perpetrators who have confirmed evidence against them dealt within the law. Not the vigilante system as it is now. Adversely when those found with no charges to answer for sex allegations (at whatever stage) – are now, in theory, the victims – CICA refuse to pay them despite all they and their families have suffered and continue to suffer.”

    Often, even those who are released from prison when new evidence arises are not awarded compensation for the years of their lives spent behind bars. Police and other authorities operate in the belief that “…it may be that innocent people are being convicted, but we ought to be more worried about the guilty who might get away.” Sir William Utting, former Chief Inspector of Social Services. I would rather an under-inclusive justice system than an over-inclusive one that ruins the lives of innocent individuals.

    I suggest those in similar situations to me write to their local MP and the police in order to raise awareness of the issue. Too many people fear the consequences and stigma of speaking out, but we need brave individuals to show not just rape, but also false allegations of rape, is a nationwide epidemic being swept under the carpet by muddled government statistics, warped by officials that do not dare admit that they do not have these crimes under control, because they cannot face the fact that "he said / she said" crimes are almost impossible to prove one way or another, without distrust from the public of their organisation as a whole.

    I say let’s admit that the system doesn’t work and initiate brainstorming some solutions that might. It’s time that victims of rape and those falsely accused realise we are not on opposing sides, but the same side. We are both looking for justice for TRUE victims in all situations. This is not an issue for feminists or mens-rights groups to quable over, this is an issue affecting both genders both accuser and accused.

    We do not live in a black-and-white world, where either the accused or the alleger is always in the right so the systems should stop treating it as such.

    Decades ago, police would often laugh away cases of abuse, stating they were ‘asking for it’ or under the belief that spousal rape, for example, wasn’t even an issue. Now the pendulum has swung the other way. It’s time for the pendulum to rest at a happy centre point.

    I am all too aware of the impact this situation has impacted upon my family and friends from a financial, emotional and relationship point of view. One thing I can take out of this situation is a clearer view of who really believes in me. One friend of mine has become much closer through her support during this difficult time; my estranged father, on the other hand, has become even more disinterested in having any relationship with me. I never felt judged by my friends, but I did worry talking about it too much would lead people to become indifferent and stop answering my calls. Luckily, I am self-employed. Many others are dismissed or suspended from their work.

    My advice to others in a similar situation would be to stay strong, time does make things better (I can confirm this as I am starting to get my life back on track and also attempt to make a difference by raising awareness) and take back your power when you know the truth no matter what the police and misguided individuals would have you believe.

    For now I wonder whether my past will affect my future in regards to my choice of potential partner and whether I will be fully able to trust again. Each day I remind myself that whilst most people are authentic, it is important to keep your wits about you. As a romantic I believe that one day I will meet a person that will make my past worthwhile.

    If you or a family member has been personally affected by these issues don’t hesitate in going to your doctor and insisting on a referral for counselling from a professional or contact FASO http://www.false-allegations.org.uk for advice and emotional support.

    Comment


    • #3
      That's very inspiring, thank you.
      They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

      Comment


      • #4
        I am SO sorry about what you went through. You seem so brave and strong and your post is articulate and very true. Big virtual hugs.
        Who you become while you are waiting is as important as what you are waiting for -Nicky Gumble

        Comment


        • #5
          My apologies. I can't work out if you were NFA'd or sytill waiting.

          Margaret and the others at FASO are fab. Also check out http://www.pafaa.org.uk/wordpress

          You mentioned you have friends/acquaintances in common with the accuser. If you are still waiting for a result it might help to find out what they know about him. The business of writing #rapey (prior to meeting you) suggests he has sex abuse "on the brain" and possibly sees it where non exists.

          Tinder is well known for similar incidents. You just don't know who people are and you have to go on trust. As you now know, you cannot go on face value.

          it sounds like one of two things:

          regretted sex

          or

          he deliberately wanted to entrap you for whatever reasons known to himself: maybe he's skint; maybe his partner fell out with him so he wanted to throw in the sympathy card........

          Keep posting.
          People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

          PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

          Comment


          • #6
            What a thoughtful, considered, and well-articulated post.

            It really is deserving of a much wider audience than this forum but I can't think how. A slot in the Sunday broadsheets would be good but I suspect they may want any article under your real name which would hardly be ideal!
            'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

            Comment


            • #7
              Luckily the case was NFA'd after many delays even with the lack of evidence.

              I've recently started dating again, now paying more attention to my intuition, but it's difficult to not be more withdrawn than before this happened - since I prefer to be overly cautious now, than end up in a situation with another nutter! I would like to find a monogamous/committed relationship rather than hookups, in the meantime I'm still open to them, but more selectively...

              I reckon he regretted it and the financial motives were just a benefit.

              Originally posted by Rights Fighter View Post
              My apologies. I can't work out if you were NFA'd or sytill waiting.

              Margaret and the others at FASO are fab. Also check out http://www.pafaa.org.uk/wordpress

              You mentioned you have friends/acquaintances in common with the accuser. If you are still waiting for a result it might help to find out what they know about him. The business of writing #rapey (prior to meeting you) suggests he has sex abuse "on the brain" and possibly sees it where non exists.

              Tinder is well known for similar incidents. You just don't know who people are and you have to go on trust. As you now know, you cannot go on face value.

              it sounds like one of two things:

              regretted sex

              or

              he deliberately wanted to entrap you for whatever reasons known to himself: maybe he's skint; maybe his partner fell out with him so he wanted to throw in the sympathy card........

              Keep posting.

              Comment


              • #8
                Thank you for your kind words!

                Honestly I wrote this with the intention of perhaps trying to get it published in one of the papers, but mostly I did it just for myself to get it out of my system. As it's still a bit of a sensitive topic, I didn't want to put too much of my focus trying to get it published but wanted to get it out there, unfortunately people who read it on this forum are probably going to see it too late to use it as any type of cautionary tale, but hopefully it's good to know that in many cases the nightmare does end.

                Originally posted by Casehardened View Post
                What a thoughtful, considered, and well-articulated post.

                It really is deserving of a much wider audience than this forum but I can't think how. A slot in the Sunday broadsheets would be good but I suspect they may want any article under your real name which would hardly be ideal!

                Comment


                • #9
                  I totally agree with Carsehardened. A very well written article, but so sad that it is true and actually happened.

                  I don't know the publicity answer, but having found this forum that same way as everyone else, when in the depths of despair, I am sure the "General" public, if made more aware would be horrified.

                  "We" need to get more publicity. Bail needs to be timed, and not eight months Of hell that I and my partner suffered. His work mobile was taken, along with his work computer.

                  We had to purchase a new Iphone contract but were unable to get a clear answer if we could even still use the number! No one would or could tell us. We had to purchase a new computer.

                  Although we got an NFA last week, we still have no idea when we can collect our property which also includes our home PC.

                  Well done in returning to the world. Take care - and if I could meet I would give you a big hug as you are the same age as my children, and it's wrong so wrong what you , and I have gone through because of totally selfish people. xx

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I've just read your horrific story. As a gay man myself who has been falsely accused, I sympathise with your situation although my circumstances were different as it was a family member who accused me. Anyone should be able to meet someone on a social networking site for consensual sex without the fear of facing a lawsuit for a false rape allegation. Your accused' behaviour sounds strange and very alarming. Do you mind me asking how long did you spend with him that evening? Gut instincts are powerful things and I often kick myself that I didn't follow mine but don't be too hard on yourself. This is not your fault. It does sound like there was an element of planning involved and you will probably never know the motivation for his behaviour. What is important is that you are accessing the right support. These kinds of allegations can leave people traumatised for years. Being wrongly accused of rape is one of the worst things you could be accused about. The police don't care and like you say, they automatically believe the accuser and the whole system is geared in favour of the accuser. Thank god it did not go any further for you and I hope you are able to start putting this horrific experience behind you but sounds like you might need some help along the way.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I've just read your story today. Very glad everything worked out for you.

                      It's very eloquently written. Have you had any luck publishing?

                      Rosa Silverman works on the Telegraph Features Desk and is on Twitter. The paper has been focusing on false allegations this week & last with the Louis Richardson story & historic child abuse. It might make a magazine piece.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by wakingnightmare View Post
                        I've just read your story today. Very glad everything worked out for you.

                        It's very eloquently written. Have you had any luck publishing?

                        Rosa Silverman works on the Telegraph Features Desk and is on Twitter. The paper has been focusing on false allegations this week & last with the Louis Richardson story & historic child abuse. It might make a magazine piece.
                        I'd be very careful about publishing any stories regarding false allegations - I would always seek legal advice first to ensure there will be no nasty comebacks. Imagine if your accuser reads the story and then tries to make a claim against you. You just need to cover your own back. I'm sure there are also laws around ensuring accusers are kept anonymous.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          ohhh sooo agree with reducing/limiting pre-charge bail time. The social services said that my husband is only allowed supervised access (1.5 days a week) for our 3 children (6year, 4year and 10month when allegation happened) this has been the most devestating aspect of it,my OH who never spent a night away from our children from the day my eldest was born was suddenly taken out of the family home, and after 7 months of bail this last week my children have finally settled down (although tears about it the other day from my 6 year old) at least there is a lot less crying for daddy during the night. The only reason for this supervised access is because of the investigation, if they reduced the bail it would of been sorted and my hubby would of been home months ago and my children less emotionally damaged......

                          also reading today, (can't remember quite where but somewhere) that a bloke brought a bike of gumtree and got arrested for stealing it. Despite having all the evidence that he got it f gumtree and not had contact with the buyer before, he's been on bail for 7 months!!!!!! (just because computer forensics haven't checked his phone yet)

                          unbelievable!!!

                          hxx
                          "Only True Love Can Survive This"

                          -Hubby was accused - arrested in June 2015 - re-bailed December 2015 - NFA'd March 31st 2016 - SS allowed him back home to our family April 2016-

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